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Cast | Episode Guide | Interviews | Notes | Pictures | My Summaries | My Reviews

Cast

Created & written by Tommy Blacha & Brendon Small
Directed by Jon Schnepp & Chris Prynoski

Episode Guide

Season 1 (2006) WITHOUT Malcolm

Season 2 (2007-08) 
with Malcolm in all episodes in multiple roles

His character is also in the Bloodrocuted music video from 10/07

Season 3 (2009-10) 
with Malcolm in all episodes in multiple roles. Note episodes are double the length 22 mins.
His character is not in the Bloodlines music video from 9/09

 Interviews

Behind the Mayhem with Co-Creator Brendon Small
By Peter Atkinson | KNAC 10/22/07

"It gets kind of complicated, I can do interviews as myself, but sometimes people will get really excited to hear the character's voice, so I'll do it that way," said Small, whose previous Cartoon Network foray was the charming cult fave "Home Movies," in which he portrayed a precocious 8-year-old would-be filmmaker. "Or I just answer questions for the characters as myself to not embarrass anybody - mainly me (laughs). I like to keep the character stuff within reason, I do these voices all day long and I can't escape them.

KNAC: Do you find it easier to talk about Dethklok as yourself or as your characters?

Small: I, as Brendon, can talk about a lot of Dethklok stuff that they really can't. The thing about Dethklok is the camera that follows them in omniscient one, it shows stuff that Dethklok can't even know about, as far as the Tribunal and what's going on behind the scenes. They don't know it's on TV. I don't have a problem bopping back and forth between characters, but I just did a podcast that I think lasted 14 hours, or at least it seemed that long, where they wanted to ask super-specific drum questions to Pickles and stuff. I'm a guitar player, but I know my drum stuff. But they were asking like, "So Pickles, when you sit at the drum throne how do you position yourself?" And I'm like (in Pickles' nasally Wisconsin twang), "Well, the thing about it is..." I'm trying desperately to think of something clever. And it's live and I'm like "I can't get out of this interview." And it went on forever. And a lot of the metal guys when we do interviews want to know "Hey, what do you guys think about Gwar, or what bands would you like to kill?" And I'm not really gonna touch that because I don't have a bone to pick with people. It might seem like we're making fun of them, but the truth is we like a lot of those bands.

KNAC: You've had pretty good luck lining up some genuine metal legends to guest voices.

Small: Mark Hamill is also on there. Luke fucking Skywalker! This second season, we've got Malcolm McDowell. What a unique meeting of different creative people - it's total geek fodder. Most of the show is just for me, you know. A lot of fans like it, but I'm like Mark Hamill, Malcolm McDowell, George "Corpsegrinder" Fisher (from Cannibal Corpse), King Diamond, the Metallica guys, the dork in me is in heaven. I'm like one of those spoiled rich kids who has the birthday where everybody comes, even though he doesn't deserve it. We've gotten very lucky. The whole trick to getting the show started was making sure that the metal dudes realized that we're not trying to take the piss out of metal. The joke is about something else, the joke is about celebrityism. The good thing for us as script writers and music writers and as the show's creators is it gets to be about metal. It gets to be something that we give a shit about, and have fun with, we really enjoy. And sure there may be some jokes about metal, but everyone's part of the joke.

KNAC: And though the setting and storyline is more absurd than, say, Spinal Tap, the characters really aren't that far removed from reality.

Small: There's certain archetypes that keep popping up in bands that we have kind of exploited. There's gonna be a guy who doesn't get the spotlight as much as the other guy, a bass player who doesn't really have a part musically in the band and gets mixed out of every song, and the self-hatred some of these guys have to deal with, and the guys in the band who own the publishing and other half of the band that doesn't and you're all stuck in a bus together for half a year. It's an exercise in narcissism and selfishness. One of the first philosophies of this show is "a band is a family with no love." You're in a situation where it actually looks and sounds like a group of brothers and they're all in it, but it's not. When you have people partying together and you're all sleeping in the same room and you have to travel in a bus, you have this disdain and this familiarity. It's so great to talk to bands and hear them talk about each other. They don't hate each other, but they're a little sick of each other, they're so familiar with each other, it's like (in Pickles' voice, again) "here we go again with this story!" Or, "great, he didn't wash his shorts again."

KNAC: Yet even though the Dethklok guys live in this massive Viking boat with like 1,000 rooms where they can get away from each other, they always seem to be together.

Small: That's a celebrity thing too because there's lot of isolation with celebrity. They don't know anything else but than to hover around one another, you see celebrities always hanging out at the same place because they don't really have any actual friends anymore. Somebody told me a story about party that they went to, it was huge, these were major celebrities, and pretty much everyone they invited were like their stockbrokers and their lawyers and agents, people that they work with. It wasn't like cool, hip people, it was like their realtor. It was so boring. It's like "we're isolated, we can't talk to people, we stopped being like regular humans."

KNAC: Or you get something like Paris Hilton coming to the rescue of Britney Spears.

Small: Exactly. It's like, "we don't like each other but we're stuck in this kind of world. We're the only ones that can actually get through to each other." It's those kinds of things the show is really taking the piss out of. It's really about not paying attention to anything that's going on in the world around you except what's right in front of your face, even though what you do effects the world, for good or bad.

KNAC: We usually hear short snippets of songs on the show, do you write full-blown songs for the show, or just those snippets that you fleshed out into the songs that are on the album?

Small: When I write scripts it takes me a while, I rewrite and you have to get your head around stuff, but with music I go with instinct and I go fast because I put it off to the last second, when I have to have something. Whether it's sloppy or good or bad, that's the song and that's how long it lasts and that's how much I have. So basically what I had were these half songs that were blueprints for full songs, and I built on those for the album.

KNAC: Since you're the voice of Nathan Explosion, "the lyrical visionary" in Dethklok, do you treat the lyrics any differently than the music?

Small: I'd like to have a bit of a reason to have a song. Like I knew "Bloodrocuted" was going to be a song, but I didn't know what it was going to be about. And then sometimes I'll write an entire song and figure out what it's about as I'm writing it, even if its stupid, it's gotta score stupid points. I guess I'm lucky because I can have songs about eating spaghetti if I want to, but I'd like to have them be in the vein of what the characters feel and what they think is cool. I kind of put myself in their mindset, or at least Nathan. There's a song on the album called "Face Fisted" where I wanted it to be about (in Nathan's voice) "just fucking beating people up, I'm gonna kick your ass, you know. Yeah!"

KNAC: Maybe Nathan can explain what "Bloodrocuted" is about?

As Nathan Explosion: Well there's this guy, an electrician, who he gets mistaken for a criminal and is being chased by mercenaries. But as he's running, he remembers from biology class that blood is an energy conductor. So he leads them into a trap, see, at power generator. He cuts himself, bleeds all over the power lines and when the mercenaries step in the blood they get "bloodrocuted," their eyes explode and they die. It's brutal. He bleeds to death, but he takes all the other guys with him. So I guess it has a happy ending. Sort of.

KNAC: Nice. Back to the real world, so to speak, just how are you going to do this tour?

Small: That's a good question. When the show was first being conceived of by Tommy and myself it was like "yeah, if we want to go out on tour we could do something like Gorillaz" [where the physical band played behind a specially designed screen that covered the stage area and the visuals were a mix of animation and silhouettes] and then all the fans started writing in and saying "dude, you should go on tour but do it like Gorillaz." Everyone was on the same page, and I was like "well, if we do it, it should be cool, it should be funny and we should have a pretty good band playing. And it shouldn't be about the actual band playing onstage, we should hear the band but not see them." So we might be backlit, nearly out of sight or something, and we'll have like an extended episode of the show playing on a huge screen that we'll play along to. So it will be a mix of music, and the characters telling little stories throughout, have these soundoff points where you get to laugh. The musicianship should be incredibly good, and it should take itself seriously enough to do it right. So that's what we're doing now.

KNAC: I know Gene Hoglan played on the Dethklok album, who's going to be in the touring band?

Small: I have a great group of musicians that I'll be playing with that I'm really excited to have. Gene Hoglan is on drums. He's amazing and he's just a cool guy. He is just a monster, he has great instinct, as much as I try to throw him off he picks right up on it, which is great because we're going to be playing to click tracks on the tour to match up with animation. Then I have some friends, a guitar hero of mine named Mike Keneally who played with Frank Zappa on his last tour, he can do anything on guitar. He's an amazing, scary, instinctive player. And a bass player who plays with him pretty often, Bryan Beller. They're really cool guys, good sense of humor and scary players. And then I'll be playing and singing. I'm real happy to be the weak link in this lineup.

KNAC: "Home Movies" such an understated, innocent show. What the hell happened for you to switch gears to all of the sound and fury and violence of Dethklok?

Small: "Home Movies," oh my god, I miss those days. It was like, "here's a season, is anyone watching? It doesn't matter. Let's just do another season and not talk to anybody about it, just keep working." It was great to have something that was just completely under the radar and just kind of put it out there. The people who got it did, and the people who hated it, hated it. I was very proud of that show, it was exactly what I wanted it to be. But this show I wanted to be the exact opposite of that. And I gave myself a huge amount more work to do. It turns out I'm a control freak as far as doing the music and writing and voicing, and then going into the studio after the last day of color correction on the first episode and working for a couple months straight to get the record together. And the worst part is, with season two, people expect it to be good. (laughs) But having said that, I'm incredibly happy with season two. The pressure is on and the big mantra around here is "don't suck." You've got to learn from what you did from last season and make it better and our options are limited because we did a lot of cool stuff last season. But we'll do more creative stuff, keep pushing it and make it heavier and brutaller - or more brutal, rather (laughs) - and then stupider. Let's keep up the stupidity, but still make it smart so you have that conflict going on.

KNAC: Yeah, you don't want to end up like "Ren & Stimpy," where the show was great out of the box and inventive and cool, then just degenerated into boogers and fart jokes.

Small: (laughs) We're trying not to do that. Although boogers and farts are pretty funny, we've had a few of them.

KNAC: But if that's all there is?

Small: Well, we aspire to do something a bit more. Our goal with the last episode of the first season was to open up the world and start telling the story of Dethklok. The shows on Adult Swim are great, and I like going back to them and just laughing for laughing's sake, but I also wanted to do something that TV is built to do, and that's be episodic, be able to tell something a little more about this world and be able to give a sliver of story every couple of episodes about one particular character or another and keep that moving and keep that alive so people want to know what happens with the outside world and the inside world of Dethklok. And you really can't accomplish that with just, what did you say? Farts and boogers? (laughs)

KNAC: Will you start working in the back story and explain some of the history of the band and its origins? Or are you just going to leave that a mystery?

Small: We're not giving that up, yet. We may drop hints here and there, but that's something we're holding onto, we know that information but we're not letting it out. It's a bunch of things, having long discussions, headaches and making sure we know what we're talking about, then doling out slivers of it and not letting everybody know until we feel it's the right time. The inception of Dethklok is kind of a guarded thing, and that's something we're inevitably asked when we do these things in character and we just can't answer. You will find out.

KNAC: Is that the kind of thing you'd save for a movie?

Small: Well, we're saving some things for the possibility of that. But the thing is with Dethklok is strike while the iron is hot, it's all about momentum. However, I would like to take a few days off - and have a good long cry. (laughs) But that is in the forward thinking, something that is a little bit more grandiose, something that will very easily lend itself to a cinematic treatment. Some cartoon shows lend themselves to a movie better than others, we want this one to be like, should we end going in that direction.

KNAC: There's a couple incredibly extensive Wikipedia pages about Dethklok that are constantly being updated, do you have anything to do with them and are you worried they might give some of the Dethklok secrets there?

Small: No, not really. Because the show's secrets, if you want to call them that, exist in mine and Tommy's heads. And on one of those pages, me and Tommy never put this out there, but someone out there, someone at Adult Swim, described the show as "Spinal Tap meets Norway meets Scooby Doo." We never said that, those are not our words. The Spinal Tap thing is cool, but I fucking hate Scooby Doo. I think it's a shitty show, I never liked it. And Norway, we never really say where the bands lives. We know, but we don't say it in any of the episodes. That was just one of those Hollywood mishmashes, this meets that meets that. The pitch for our show was "it's about a fucking metal band, there's gonna be murder and we're not going to understand anything anyone says. That's the show." That was my original pitch to Adult Swim. I don't know how they got "Norway meets Scooby Doo" out of that. Fuck Scooby Doo.

KNAC: The new season picked up from the first season's cliffhanger ending, will things just carry forward from there, or will you be taking things in an entirely different direction?

Small: I don't want to give too much away, but yeah, with the first episode, we meet up pretty much where it ended last season, which is where Dethklok was attacked in Poland in the Gulf of Danzig, it was kind of a rogue attempt at taking them out by Gen. Crozier. And what happened there was Gen. Crozier and Cardinal Ravenwood were punished by their boss, Mr. Salacia, and at the end of that episode you find out he's kind of magic, you find out he can kill people with his thoughts. So we'll be trying to figure out who that guy is for a few episodes, because no one really knows who he is. Meantime, Dethklok has been in hiding, the attack kind of shook them up, they are afraid and they don't want to come out, they don't want to play for anyone, so they need a good reason to come out. The world has just turned into a darker place. It turns out that if you take Dethklok out of the mix, the economy falls apart. But Dethklok gets an offer to perform at the world's largest execution, and they get to decide how the people are killed. And they are upset by how awesome that is, so it means they have to do it. So it's a little darker second act, but we get back to the stupidity real soon. We get right back into silliness.

KNAC: Which characters do you find yourself relating more to, the precocious kids in "Home Movies," or the debauched alpha males in Dethklok?

Small: (laughs) It's funny to be negative and narcissistic and thinking only of yourself. That unfortunate part of me does relate to Dethklok. "Home Movies," that was more personal, and I easily could relate more to that kind of thing. But, honestly, Dethklok is about the selfish part of me, it's about the fact that I get to do this and play guitar all day. And that I've designed the ultimate job for myself, that part I relate to because it's for me when I was 14, Home Movies was for me when I was 8. This is me as the fat suburban crappy kid trying to play guitar, listening to [Joe Satriani's] Surfing With The Alien and then Slayer and then all kinds of different guitar cool, awesome stuff and learning all the stuff. I was really excited about that stuff, I just remember thinking "what if these guys ever got to be on TV," or at least people like them. Whether or not those people would inadvertently murder all day long, if given the chance (laughs), I can't say.

KNAC: Since you are a Berklee trained musician, does any of your musical personality show up in any of the characters?

Small: There's a Skwisgaar joke about (in Skwisgaar's nearly unintelligible Swedish twang) "I cants reads musics," and the same with Toki, when they have to play the "grandspas guitars" [acoustic instruments] after they summon the Finnish lake troll, which devours all the electricity in the area. And I do suck about reading music, that's a very true thing, and I think most guitarists would admit to that too.

KNAC: Are you surprised that people are taking Dethklok's music as seriously as they seem to?

Small: It's funny because I take the music part seriously. The way I look at Dethklok is that if I'm given the opportunity to do a show about a band, I should take that opportunity seriously. Whether or not the storylines are serious is a different matter. You can sweat over the jokes and is it funny enough and lose sleep over stuff like that, but the way I figure it is it should sound cool and if it does sound cool, that will help everything, it will kind of work on its own momentum, its own steam. They should be good at what they do, it shouldn't be about a band that sucks. And it shouldn't something trite like Josie and the Pussycats or the Archies. That's what irks me about the whole "Norway meets Scooby Doo" thing. There's nothing that silly about Dethklok. I know I said it before, but I really mean it. Fuck Scooby Doo. And you can print that.

Notes

• Each episode is only around 12 minutes.

• Airs on Cartoon Network, part of Adult Swim at 11:45pm Sunday night after Robot Chicken.

• Malcolm appeared in the Season Two premiere episode Dethecution as the voice of a convicted baby killer.

• In the second episode he switches characters to play Vata one of the council members who try to manipulate Dethklok. This role continues for the rest of the season.

• Band members: Nathan Explosion - Vocals: has long black hair, deep voice, not very bright, very angry, has a line of his own hot sauce, dated a supermodel he couldn't stand because it was the most brutal thing ever.
• Skwisgaar Skwigelf - Lead Guitar: From Sweden, blonde, fastest guitarist alive, plays guitar all the time, even in the hot tub, very tall, likes to have sex with old women.
• Toki Wartooth - Rhythm Guitar: From Norway. Second-fastest guitarist alive, but can't read music and doesn't really do anything in the band. Children love him because of his childish songs.
• William Murderface - Bass: hates everything, loves being a dick, can't spell, thinks he's smart, speaks like he has a hairlip, plays bass solos with his penis, during recording his bass is turned down so no one can hear it. Has an obsession with pissing and his side project is called Planet Piss, though he's never recorded a song for them.
• Pickles - Drummer: Raised in the Midwest, he became the most famous metal drummer after fronting L.A. rock band Snakes and Barrels, not to be confused with Guns N' Roses. Wears his red hair braided, is an alcoholic, has a sponsorship for nickels.
• Charles Foster Ofdensen - their mysterious business manager who has powers the band doesn't even know about.

Pictures

Alfred Belmer mugshot photo from Dethecution
Vata Orlag from Dethlessons
Vata Orlag in the Bloodrocuted music video
Channel 57 reporter from Dethfashion
Eric in the film clip from Dethfashion
Amazon Explorer from Dethcarrado
Vata shown standing from Dethcarrado
Channel 57 reporter from Dethgov
Vata with smoke & fire behind him from Dethrelease
Vata standing from Dethrelease

My Summaries

Dethecution

    In hell demons are howling and stoking fires while creatures are flying. Down in a pit Cardinal Ravenwood is on a table with General Crozier and Mr. Salacia standing over him. The general wakes up in a hospital, he doesn't remember what happened after his mission. A doctor talks to him about it. He heard the cardinal died of a heart attack and he wants to get back to work. He gives him a prescription and says to tell him if he remembers anything.
    KQQZ and other TV channels are talking about a global depression because Dethklok hasn't played since the water concert amid security fears. The president even shoots himself in the face to get them to come back
    Their manager Charles comes to them with the schedule for recording the new album. The guys are eating turkey in a large hall and don't want to be bothered. Murderface says he never asks them about their feelings, what about how am I doing you robot? Then they all call him a robot. So he asks how they are doing. Skwisgaar says they are in the middle of eating. Toki wants to mace the turkey and no one cares. He sprays it from his crotch like urine. Charles asks what is that? A pelvic mace belt. Then they go outside and mace each other in the crotch. Charles says they are supposed to hit each other in the face. Nathan wants to turn over a picnic table and Charles keeps trying to tell him he had it bolted down and Nathan is mad that he disrupted his tantrum.
    They are all in the hot tub and Charles wants them to get out and tour. He's never seen them in such a funk before. They are worried about the fans trying to kill them. He has a plan, a mass execution concert. Not interested. He says they can choose the way they die. Nathan is pissed because it sounds so awesome, so they have to do it, but it has to be brutal.
    Reporters talk about prisoners being allowed to come from all over the globe to die. The prison is shown full of convicts in the yard surrounded by walls and guards. All are proud to die for Dethklok except Alfred Belmer the cannibalistic baby murderer who has eaten 274 babies and toddlers. Cops load him into a car and he says, "Dethklok is scum, it is repulsive to the (beep) here, that's what it is."
    The media says people are waiting for them to arrive and several 100 have died of heat exhaustion in the sun staring up for them. Then a drill comes out of the ground and a spider like ship appears with the band playing on it and the slave guards operate it. This song is "Let the Dying Begin" and prisoners are launched on missiles, then the missiles are shot down and explode into patterns like guitars and skulls. One prisoner says it's his birthday. Pieces of body parts rain down on a family BBQ and a couple about to make out in a car bloodying them. They launch into the chorus of die die die as Skwisgaar's mace belt goes off and goes through the floor spraying one of the pilots in the face who in turn knocks another pilot over. They start to lose control and the boring drill kill fans and hits a prison wall and the prisoners start to escape. Guards start to kill them, but more prisoners kill guards. One eats a guard, Belmer pounds one in the face with a rock saying "eat this." One's scalp is ripped off, one is thrown from the wall and most escape.
    News reports call it the most bloody prison escape ever, will the country ever come back from this? The news ticker says people are now making the trek to stores to wait for the new Dethklok album. The next says the president's approval rating shot up and the economy is on a huge rise because of the new album on the horizon. The president is back with his face stitched up and thanks them.
    At home Pickles is trying to hit tennis balls from a machine while the other guys each mace turkey which they now like to eat. They wait for the manager and tell him to sit, but he wants to stand. Nathan tells him they are sorry and he can go. For letting dangerous criminals out on the streets? No, for calling him a robot, he's not a robot. They must've really hurt him. He doesn't care. They say there was some problems with the show though. Macing the pilot and letting out the most dangerous prisoners? No the lighting was a little off. Murderface says his boots weren't comfortable enough, proper footwear is important. Nathan agrees, he's glad that he got them back out there. Then Charles reminds them about the album to record and they call him a robot again.
    Over the credits Belmer has a baby on plate he's going to eat. He puts a bib on, then pulls out a large knife and pronged fork and motions the baby to shush. Then he goes to cut it as it is still alive and it ends.

Dethlessons

    Massive Egyptian style statues of Nathan, Murderface and Pickles float in space. Toki and Skwisgaar are on a platform in battle armor and go after each other with swords. Then it cuts to a huge concert Dethlok is playing. Skwisgaar looks over at Toki and he's playing some solo. Skwisgaar comes over and pulls out his cord. Toki gets mad. Skwisgaar asks what the hell is he doing. Toki wants to play scales and notes like him, but he doesn't let him. Skwisgaar says you are attacking me. Toki says to the crowd you are holding me back, I'm the guitarist too. The crowd boos, Toki walks off.
    Charles has a meeting with the 3 guys. He's worried about Toki. Nathan says he's the guitarist on the right isn't he? Charles says he's upset and has a guitar magazine showing him at war. Pickles says what does he care, he doesn't even practice. He doesn't do anything. Nathan says he makes the sandwiches. Murderface says he makes them, Nathan is surprised and admits he doesn't do anything.. Murder tells Charles to get out of there, write it down, get out of here idiot. Then he says he's just palling around, being a dick. Charles leaves. Murderface says notice how he gets mad and I'm not mad, that's being a dick. Pickles and Nathan are impressed. Nathan says it's a gift. Pickles wonders how he turns it on like that. Years of practice. He then points to a stain on Pickles shirt and when he looks he punches him in the face. Nathan says wow, what a dick. 
    Toki goes to see Skwisgaar and he says it's adorable he wants more solos, but he is the leader guitarist, meaning I'm way more gooder than him. Toki says that's why he needs a piano teacher. You mean guitar teacher? Skwis will give him lessons, take him under his flippers. Toki says he's not going down that road again. He flashes back to Skwisgaar asking him to play a harmonic key and when he doesn't do the first note he drops a bucket of paint on his head and they fight. You are not a great teacher. Skwisgaar disagrees.
    Toki leaves all mad, then finds a paper on a telephone pole with guitar lessons by Dimnels Selfcark and he takes a paper. He goes to him and he's a dirty looking old man in a gas station. He asks him where his guitar is and Toki forgot it. The man says he doesn't have what it takes, it takes lots of practice. You either have that fire or you don't. Toki says he does, he needs his own guitar identity. If you promise me you go all the way - no shortcuts, all or nothing. Toki says that takes lots of work.
    Murderface says being a dick takes lots of work. The objective is to drive somebody crazy. He says Skwisgaar is practicing and leads Nathan and Pickles in and tells him to follow his lead. He says Toki is really getting good and the guys agree with him in bad monotones like they are rehearsed. They all agree how good he's getting, he's so fast they thought it was a tape. Skwisgaar is upset that he's getting better and wants to be alone and howls.
    The senator says it appears Dethklolk are taking music lessons, allow me to officially introduce Vata Orlag a medical & spiritual specialist. "Having two guitarists in the same band is potentially destructive by itself, but when one attempts to take away the other's status, god help us. The clashing of these evils is like two warring titans. It's like Clash of the Titans… Clash of the Titans."
    Skwisgaar is home and is dreaming all kinds of crazy images, a talking guitar, demons, putting Toki in the toilet.
    Toki goes to the teacher and he asks him if he practiced. Toki admits he didn't. You want to get better? More than anything, but first happy birthday. Toki has a Popsicle stick with a guitar pick taped to the end. He can't believed he remembered. It's Toki's way of saying thanks. Then Skwisgaar slams in the door and asks if this is him, this piece of trash, that's what you are. Toki says no, he's like a father. Skwisgaar says it's him or the band, he's making a citizens band firing now. Toki says he can't without a band vote. 
    On an entertainment show the host talks about the guitar war. The world is waiting to find out what Toki can do and will find out at the Toki Wartooth guitar recital this week. The rest of the band say Skwis is a Swedish dildo licker and Toki is the new god.
    Charles says he can't sign off on the firing because some of you didn't vote. Murderface says voting sucks. Pickles was the president of the voting sucks party in school. Nathan asks how did that go. He didn't get reelected. Toki either has to work it out or leave. Toki runs away. Skwisgaar says he can't talk to him.
    Murderface goes to Skwisgaar and tells him the whole thing about Toki getting better is just a lie and leaves.
    At Toki's recital he talks about the strings and gives out the wrong names, then talks about the frets and goes into a panic with his heart beating hard. He says he can't do it. Then the master comes out and hugs him. He tells Toki he's dying and starts coughing. Skwis stands up in the middle of the audience and says he knows this is important to him, he knows he never got good, it's OK to have the relationship. On the left side Nathan yells out he sorry he manipulated him and was wrong. On the right side Pickles says he's sorry. Nathan yells over that he already said that. Skwisgaar says the band needs him, though he does nothing. In the back Murderface says he's sorry for being a dick, he can't suppress it sometimes, all of you go kill yourselves, nah he's just being a dick. The master says before he goes he loves him. Then there's a shot of a cemetery with a Gibson guitar shaped tombstone.

Dethvengence

    In a dungeon the nameless Assassin who was supposed to be killed by Charles at the end of season 1 is torturing a man to find the secret entrance to Mordhouse where Dethklok. He says there is none, laughs, then swallows a cyanide pill and dies.
    A kid in his parents home finds a website to illegally download Dethklok songs. There's a warning of grave consequences if he does. He doesn't care and says he'll masturbate while he waits for it. Then an alarm goes back to Mordhouse and a hit squad of roadies comes to the kids' house, murders his parents, tasers him and takes him away.
    The senator says Dethklok is taking the law into their own hands. The general says it is preposterous. Vata says they are well within their rights, General Crozier. The senator says world leaders wanted to make Dethklok happy. Vata says there is a purchase and thieving clause that was banned by the United Nations this year that allows Dethklok to act as a police force. The general says just because they can be bought off doesn't mean it's right. Vata says it's not about right or wrong, general. At this point it simply is. The senator explains they have a secret prison beneath Mordhouse where they put those who violate musical and intellectual property. They show pictures of missing people including the Jomfrune brothers' from the Diefordethklok website. They also have scientists working there as in house developers of sound technology.
    In their prison Dethklok's roadies torture the downloading kid by playing the music he stole really loud. He says it's too loud. Upstairs Dick Knubbler their producer says it's a rough mix of what they have been working on. The band says it's lacking, too confined and too digital. Murderface says sorry if we have learned, sensitive musical ears. Skwis says you are right. Murderface says that was me. Toki says it sounds like microchips, Nathan agrees with Pickles. Toki says that wasn't Pickles. Nathan says it was a good impression then and he has to yell 'right Pickles' over and over for him to hear. Dick says you can't tell the sound difference between anything, you can't hear at all. They are working at getting back to Analog.
    They go down in an elevator with bad music playing to the labs where scientists are making new inventions - guitars with laser strings, special drums and dildo helmets. Then 2 scientists explain what is new and want to say the words together and alternate, but keep screwing it up. It's a Hydro Electrical Recordinational Device (HERD). They eventually say it will be recording on the purest analog format - water. Dick says it's impossible and the band offers to try it. Nathan does a mic check and roadies give power to a nuclear furnace to get things started and they go into a song and appear as shadows with flames behind them. Then the flames destroy everything they come in contact with on the planet including eventually the planet itself.
    Then the scientists hands Dick a vial of water and says the track is in there, liquid purity. He plays the vial and says it's amazing. The  downloading kid is led blindfolded into a prison cell. Edgar Jomfru is there still alive and crawls over. He puts a mask he made from the skin of his brother's face on the kid and calls him his brother. He has dug out an escape route in the wall and shows him.
    A week later in the studio the band is totally drunk and Dick wants them to work and relax. They are all rambling and drinking and don't care. Nathan says ready, record this. He just makes noises, claps and goes ah oh la la la. They say it sounds clearer on water than when he did it. He wants them to burn it on water for him and the others. Murderface says he's going to throw up so record it. He does and they do. Each time requires all this setup and energy just to get it to recorded on water. 
    Meanwhile Edgar carries the kid tied on his back through the pipes. Then he hits a drop and they slide down and fall into a cavern and crash. He swims through the sewage and gets stuck in the exit pipe. Upstairs Murderface finishes on the toilet, flushing the bat wing shaped handle and the stream knocks Edgar out of the pipe and they crash into the water below.
    Later the band is so wasted that Dick is horrified to see they are using the water tracks to drink, fill the fishtank, water the plants and make noodles with.
    Edgar makes it to shore to find the Assassin waiting for them. He picks them up and carries them away.

Dethdoubles

    At a huge Duncan Hills Coffee store opening appearance Detklok's old sound man introduces them to the crowd, he wants them to show their horns, let's see a pit. The band is eating are mad they are so close to the crowd because they are dildos. They call them all douchebags, look at the that douche they say over and over pointing to each one. Nathan is so sick of this, they have no friends, they don't like each other and are just a stupid band. They are like caged rats. They can't afford friends. They are in a cage surrounded by douchebags. Murderface has a shotgun and feels safe about it. He drops the gun and it goes off. The roadies then open fire into the crowd killing them all.
    Later Charles reads them the newspaper headline and it isn't good. They say it was an accident, they do everything wrong. Charles says he has a solution. A replacement band of doubles for appearances.
    The tribunal talks about the massacre. General says no attempts on their lives. Vata says, "It means that Dethklock has greatly improved their security." The general says the doubles work for them and are really their greatest soldiers. The union between coffee and music is going to the next level, for Duncan Hills to own all the coffee shops on the planet. Vata says, "Purcell has purchased the island of Sumatra and Dethklok will perform there on top of a dormant volcano." The doubles will get the secret business contracts and that will help take them down. Mr. Salacia says to be careful, they are there to observe.
    Murderface asks they have to take their faces off and sew them on the doubles, then get their faces back and put them back on? No. You don't need to because they look just like you. Nathan thought it was a coincidence. Charles says that is the plan. Lots of famous people have doubles. Nathan wants to be Stalin, Nixon whoever. It doesn't work that way, you can only  have doubles of yourself. Murderface can't believe his double, it looks nothing like him, he's ugly, flat heads, white chicken legs, fat, stupid, etc. Then Murderface admits he looks just like him and is upset he is so ugly.
    Weeks Later. Each member is palling around with their double in the hot tub, they are their new best friends. Charles says they don't get the idea of doubles. They think they are to be their best friends, a soulmate copy of you. Charles says no, they are to replace you and get killed instead of you. Then Nathan's double suddenly disappears. He tries to make contact with the general, saying they never get time alone. Nathan comes to find him right away to pal around.
    Then we see a montage of photos with the band and the doubles eating burgers, playing miniature golf, walking on the beach and saying goodbye as they get on a plane.
    The doubles go to the Metal Day parade in Los Angeles. They have fun beating up people while riding a float. The guys watch it on TV and love it, Murderface calls them up to say they saw them on TV and Nathan wants to talk too. Nathan gushes over them and Murderface gets mad he's repeating what he said. The band talk about having a party for when they come back with balloons. Charles tells them they shouldn't be on the phone, they are supposed to be working. Murderface says he plays bass so he doesn't have to work. Nathan is in charge of the rehearsal to prepare for the concert. Nathan how is it going? He just growls a long time and says good.
    The band stands on a beach. Nathan wants to give it all up. Like kill yourself? No, like being a regular person again. Then kill yourself? No, just not be famous, kill yourself if you want. Pickles says it would be nice to walk down the street without being harassed. Toki asks where? He doesn't go anywhere. If he wants to get a pizza he can get it online. What if he doesn't want to? Too bad, you are famous.
    The news crews broadcast from the island built on coffee. It's a nervous, edgy dehydrated place as people line up for the show. The concert on Condor mountain is a long dormant volcano which will be the world's largest cup of coffee. As they play the doubles come in and start murdering people to steal the briefcase of contracts. The song they play is 'Heroes We Fear no Death'. People think the doubles are real and they kill the fans who ask for autographs. As they play Duncan Hills coffee is poured inside the crater and it causes the volcano to erupt and the lava starts killing people. The doubles steal the briefcase and go to leave, but are burned in the lava flow. People think the band is dead until the news report confirms they escaped in the chopper.
    In a burn ward of a hospital the doubles are wrapped like mummies. Charles says its time to say goodbye to the doubles. The band doesn't understand since they are still alive. He explains they are all burned, they don't look like you anymore, that's the point. Murderface says they could burn themselves to look like the doubles. Charles says it's out of the question, it's goodbye. The band wants to tell the doubles themselves. So they take them out to a burger place and their way of explaining the business partnership is over is to have Murderface shoot them all. As their blood covers the table it ends.

Bloodrocuted Music Video

A Viking type warrior is sitting on a thrown in a hellish place. As the band play we can see through his body and his bones show. A teenage metalhead boy leaves his house and walks out in the snow after seeing a light out the window. He follows it to a cave on a mountain and finds a magical skull artifact there. The council sees this and wants to destroy it. He walks across columns to get the mini skull with the helmet, picks it up and it goes into his hand, he bleeds and it goes into his heart. General Crozier authorizes an airstrike and helicopters launch from a base nearby. The pilots target the boy and he runs for it, going through a city and shock troops chase him and open fire when he runs into a dead end alley. His body is riddled with bullets and he turns into the Viking warrior from the into. He launches fire from his hands killing the troops. He falls to his knees and we see his heart. Nathan jumps off a cliff into a blood lake. At the same time the Viking also jumps and electricity flows from him. Nathan goes through the bottom and lands with the band as the Viking takes his place on the throne.

Dethfashion

    The band plays a concert on a massive ornate stage with animals in cages like lions and bears plus tubes around them with electric eels. A fashion show goes on in front of them with metal inspired costumes like a woman with a gator as a crowd of photographers in the middle takes pictures of them all. The fashions get progressively weirder as the band sings "Walk". Then the gator flips from the flashes and bites the models leg off, it flies into the electric eels tank and they get loose in the crowd shocking them to death. The bears escape and start mauling people.
    Channel 57 WHYK TV shows news footage of the event. A reporter says, "This is only a portion of the footage known as the Dethklock Dethfashion bloodbath. Dethklok has made it clear they now have an interest in the fashion clothing industry."
    Nathan wants to make the most brutal clothing in history and make it literally metal.
Reporter, "Detklok has gone above and beyond to require the designer to realize their clothing line. Eric Von Wieghlinghammer, convicted of brutally starving 57 fashion models to death. He's been vilified in the media, even movies have been made."
    Quick shots of magazine covers Der Spiler and Mord with Eric on them.
    Movie footage of Verhungert un zu Vervollkommnen (Starved to Perfect). Eric is on his knees and says, "Ze apocalypse is coming, we must stay on the ground until then or in no way we fit into my skinning paunch."
    Reporter, "Eric Von Wieghlinghammer been paroled alarmingly early from prison by the German government to work with Dethklock on their new clothing line."
    Murderface says though they are going into the world of fashion, I assure you I'm not gay.
The Senator explains the band is going into fashion. The General says they helped get Eric out. Vata says, "Research shows most fashion designers have been brutally beaten or mentally abused as children. They dance on the brink of madness." The Senator says if they make clothes for people to wear then god help us all. Mr. Salacia says to let the blackness take it's intended path.
    At home Murderface can't believe Pickles would eat a hot dog. He would never put anything shaped like that in his mouth, or a banana, sausage. He won't eat anything shaped like a dick. What about a sausage cut up? No it's like a cut up dick. What about a sandwich shaped like a dick? What kind of sandwich is shaped like that. They all say Murderface thinks about dick all the time. He doesn't, he just was saying no hot dogs. They say he always thinks about dick and mouths, but he doesn't want to admit it.
    Later, the guys are trying on new metal spiked leather clothes that Eric made for them. But none of them fit. They either lied about their measurements or have gotten fatter. It turns out Eric made them to match their last album cover when they were very buff. Nathan is now 38 inches, he used to be 30. Eric won't adjust the clothes for them because it's made of a rare leather.
    They keep the clothes on and bring in Charles to help them lose weight. He can only do it with a personal trainer and they would have to cut out sugars and such. They would rather die than do that. He says he has things to do, be happy staying fat and leaves.
    They go to the grocery store to get healthy food, but have no idea what to get or do. They don't even know about carbs. Murderface's idea is to have one big meal right before they go to sleep and then it can digest all night. They can also have Popsicles, that's like water. They all agree it's a good plan.
    Eric is running out of his special leather and needs more. A news report is on about how the clothes are selling well, but the stores are out of them.
    The band goes to a doctor and he says they have all gained 20 pounds. They don't get it. He says eating once a day slows down their metabolism and they can't burn it off. The Popsicles are pure sugar. Murderface is worse off, his teeth are falling out for some reason. He was throwing up and eating his puke because he was hungry.
    They decide to leave and go eat in a closet. They are all hiding in the dark eating and stepping on Murderface's puke bags, Nathan says they should eat somewhere else from now on away from him. They can't believe they are doing it and when the light comes on Murderface is eating a sausage and they all stare at him and he doesn't get it.
    They go see Eric about their problem and his assistants won't let them in. The barge in and find a room of torture where they are pulling skin off live people to make the clothes and there is blood, screaming and agony everywhere. They are all repulsed and Nathan says he's so fired by the way.

Cleanzo

    A behind the music style biography of Dr. Rockzo the Rock N Roll Clown is on TV. He is the son of a physical therapist and his real name is Leonard Rockstein. He saw in the paper and ad for Zazz Blammymataz looking for a singer. Bink Bonk says he had the attitude. They skyrocketed to fame, but he insisted in getting paid with cocaine. They play a tape of him flipping out that someone took his banana sandwich. Bink Bonk tells him he's paranoid. He says he will kill him. After he was kicked out and became a clown for hire. Murderface  says it's hard to see a clown go bad like that. He was also on a shortlived reality show before he robbed a police storage facility and stole 1000 pounds of coke, is at large today and in the FBI top 10. The guys are watching the story in the tub. They all hate him except for Toki. Nathan challenges Murderface for saying he wrote the songs in Dethklok because on the Rockzo clip it said he was lead songwriter. He never wrote them, he never wrote anything. Murderface says he wrote Planet Piss stuff. That's not Dethklok and you wrote nothing for them either. He writes the basslines. No, they write them for him. He could've wrote the songs if he wanted to, but he didn't. He thinks he should get credit because he could've wrote them. Nathan says he could've invented the floor, but he didn't, he shouldn't get credit for it. Murderface thinks he should. They all challenge him to write one complete song. He says he can since he has a Song writing for dummies type book. Later Toki is asleep and Dr. Rockzo calls him for help.
    The council talks about Rockzo going missing. The General says they used him and he was helpful bringing back secret Dethklok info. Vata says, "Toki Wartooth's personal history shows he has a strong trust for clowns and even though Dethklok no longer trusts Dr. Rockzo, I believe they will reconnect." Mr. Salacia says to follow the clown.
    Toki wakes up Pickles to give him a ride. He drives him in the murdercycle since he has no license. He doesn't know where they are going and busts on Toki for not having a license. They find Rockzo making a drug deal on the street and it doesn't work out. Rockzo wants to confess, he also does meth, pain pills, oxycotton, everything. He's scared and needs help.
    Nathan & Skwisgaar want Murderface to go and play them his song. He has the book and an acoustic guitar with him. They call him Crosby, Stills and Nash, Simon and Garfunkel and other mocking folk names. He struggles with it and starts playing and singing, "A million miles for nowhere' ending with "tits, a fish with tits, titty fish." Then he says it sucks and breaks the guitar. Nathan asks what was that sound.
    Rockzo is taken to Mordhouse and flips out in the kitchen so Pickles shoots him with a tranquilizer. The others ask what he's doing there. Charles says he's a criminal and cannot stay. Toki says to give him a chance, he could be nice if he's clean. Charles says OK, but he still has to go to jail after. Later Charles is torturing Rockzo face first against an electric rack like Darth Vader did to Han Solo in the  Empire Strikes Back. Rockzo thinks Charles's an angel for stopping the torture, but he gives him one more shock. Then he tells Rockzo the guys are going out for ice cream and hookers if he wants to go with them. He agrees.
    Rockzo goes into a room and it's an intervention with the band and therapist with robot arms. Nathan reads a paper he wrote on how much he hates Rockzo, though he was supposed to helping him. Murderface  tries to say it in song and smashes his acoustic guitar again. Toki likes him, but tells him he has to stop the drugs or they can't help. Rockzo thinks they all like him then sings a song like Elton John goodbye white road in a music video.
    They turn Rokzo in after rehab and he's shown without makeup for the first time. He gives a press conference and says he's clean and his nose falls off. Over the credits is a clowning around music video.

Dethwedding

    There is a news story on TV about Sydney Austria. The head of Detklok there was assassinated by terrorists called The Revengencers and the band had no comment. Meanwhile they are home and Nathan is going through the mail saying it is mostly subpoenas, possible horrible or awesome mails. Pickles gets a DVD from his brother Seth and plays it. He says it's been a long time, he's changed, is now sober, is happy, finds the world an awesome place and wants them to come to his wedding. The invitation already says featuring Dethklok. Pickles is horrified. 
    The senator briefs the counsel on it. Crozier says Seth just got out of prison after 8 months for DWI, selling fake coke and beating a whore with a brick. Vata says, "Seth is a violent, pathological liar and charlatan. I believe his reasons for marriage may simply be a chance to reunite with his brother's wealth." The senator says Dr. Lynn is their wedding expert. He says the wedding is a dark and fearful sham designed to incite anger and drain loved ones of patience, support and money. Most fail miserably in 2 years, some end in murder/suicide and a percentage end in livable hatred. Vata replies, "Marriage has always been a black and repugnant sore on human living." The doctor says since the early 1900s it all has been spun for money for wedding planers, CratenBarrel and religious organizations. Crozier says he needs to be stopped, marriage has suffered enough. Mr. Salacia says they shouldn't intervene, they should be allowed to experience the blackness. 
    The band wouldn't normally go, but they like Pickles going through hell. Nathan says Seth is a weird greedy dick. They take their train to Wisconsin and Pickles' parents say look how good Seth's doing, but he's living in the attic above their garage. Pickles isn't impressed. Seth gets close to him and starts asking for money in a trance. Then he introduces his girl. The band takes Seth to a seedy strip club and some skank with bandaids gives him a lap dance. Then two redneck thugs come over trying to shake Pickles down for money. Seth gets up on stage and gives a drunk speech. They bring pickles on stage and 2 skanks dance on him. Nathan and Skwis know they are skanks, but would still do them. 
    The next day Seth gives a speech to his family loaded with curses. He says Pickles got handed everything, he got nothing, but this will change, he's got a deal with Dethklok for business and can't wait to see what gift they got him. Pickles is out of it and tries to run away. The band chases him down as he tries to climb a chain link fence. He says he didn't know about the business deal and Murderface beats him saying it's a wedding, they won't let him go, it's too much fun. At the reception Toki is getting trashed. He tells an old lady he's doing a solo album, pukes on himself and passes out. A man asks Nathan what the difference is between bass guitar and guitar. Then asks more and more stupid questions. The two thugs arrive and need money for more alcohol and the guys send him to Pickles. Then the band performs at the wedding. The song is about a couple getting married who join together, turn into monsters and explode through the house spitting blood. 
    Seth opens his gift from the band and it's just a blender. He gets super pissed off that they are so cheap. Pickles loses it and jumps on stage and starts beating him to a pulp. Nathan and Murderface are loving it, they couldn't pay for this, it's like an eclipse, you have to see it. The police are coming so they split. 
    On the train Pickles feels really bad. The guys keep staring at him, they've never seen so much blood at a wedding before. That's what family is for, for hatred. Pickles wants to get Seth a job in the organization and they don't think that's a good idea. Charles appears in hologram form and says he does have a dangerous job for Seth if he wants it, to head Dethklok Australia. Then we see a series of newspaper headlines about Seth being appointed, an assassination attempt, Seth using the police to protect him, lawlessness ensuing and riots burning Sydney. Then Seth is seen holding a baby with his wife looking out on the city in flames.

PR Klok

    Cash Tastrophe is a game show where Pickles is in on as a celebrity guest. If he gets the question right the contestant wins a million dollars, but if it he gets it wrong he dies. Pickles is drunk and doesn't even know where he is. He's asked what planet is no longer considered a planet. His PR woman is in the green room with the band. They don't know the answer either. Pickles says the earth. The contestant is put in a tube and killed by lots of cash. 
    The senator talks about the PR woman, Liz Bane. Crozier says alias Liz Blackfin. Vata says, "Alias Liz Death Eyes. She's a religious radical from the 70s who started dozens of cults. Her biggest was the Order of the Dybbuks who would achieve immortality by taking over the bodies of French people." In 1973 twenty-eight of them killed 100 people in France. Vata, "Yes, somehow Miss Bane was cleared of all charges. Then a few years ago started the Exodus PR Firm". 
    The rest of the band wants a real PR person and Charles says he a real PR person. They keep saying they want a real one - a woman. Pickles is on TV at the Rise of the Tyrant movie premiere and they say he's the most famous one in the band, which makes him feel drunk and horny, then gives and award where he passes out drunk on stage ripping a woman's clothes off and the band wants it too. Charles says it's too much exposure. Nathan, Skwis and Murderface decide to start their own PR. Skwis says it's just telling someone things and that's what he does. Toki is playing a Battlezone type video game across the room and wants in, but they say they didn't see him, he was too far away and missed out. 
    Pickles goes on Chat with Paul and Paula a Regis & Kelly type show and they ask what he does to relax and he's a slurring drunk who doesn't make sense. In the car after he thinks he made a few mistakes, Liz says he's doing great. Murderface leads the band meeting. PR is about being seen. He says everyone goes on TV. Nathan and Skwis say the same thing he says. They have to go on something other than TV.  Toki joins and they want him out. 
    They go to a Juice Joint opening and Toki joins them. They have press releases, but aren't sure if they should mail them to the press. A kid recognizes them and they say they are not them. They don't want to be seen and want to publicize things nobody ever has. They have a PR firm stone placed underwater where people on their ship die, in the arctic and out in space like a monolith. The press reads they promote nothing to nobody. Charles says they spent 17 million on nothing. Pickles comes in and they are all excited since he's the guy from the magazines and realize they already know him. He says they have a gig and the band jumps at it. 
    Liz meets with Pickles and he says he's gotten a calendar, she says she doesn't use earth calendars anyone. He doesn't understand. She gives him a $5 coupon and he leaves. She reveals her plan on a computer to make him the most famous celebrity on earth, get millions of new followers, take all their money, torture and brainwash them, have the concert where Nile's comet is going to hit the Earth, followers are poisoned and kill the band. 
    The band arrives for the show and Liz speaks about destiny. Pickles asks if they have any songs with destiny in the title. Nathan says no, but he can add it since no one knows what he's saying. Followers line up and are put into chairs and die as the comet comes close. The PR block in space hits the comet and it misses the observation building where the band is playing and breaks up with pieces going all over killing the TV entertainment reporter, the kid at the juice bar and Liz as she drives away.

Dethcarrado

    Cannibal Culture Ethnographic Special - Secrets of the Yaneemango is on TV. An explorer narrates, "The Yaneemango Indians live in the most remote parts of the Amazon jungle." The band is watching it on their DVR and argue about rewinding or fast forwarding the show. Nathan wants to see it, the others don't. They control it with foot pedals, like they would use for guitar. When they talk about a new drug called Yopu Pickles is intrigued, rewinds it and wants to make sure he says it right and wonders why he's never heard of it. "They use a hallucinogenic drug called Yopu. Yopu enters the nasal cavities via a long pipe. They achieve a trance like state, then communicate with the spirit world by drumbeats. We wondered how they would react by hearing the world's most popular art form - Dethklok." Then they play the natives Dethklok.
    Pickles reads about the drug in the library and says it turns you into your ancient animal form. Murderface wants to know what kind it will turn him into. Pickles says his breath smells and to stop reading over his shoulder. He says to make to make his animal really cool and he'll go. Pickles tells him he can't stand his breathing. Skwis is reading about the wood in the Brazilian forest and he's going to make a guitar out of it and Toki wants one too. He says not to copy everything he does all the time. Murderface asks Nathan what he's reading and he says nothing, why don't you brush your teeth? He says he can't in the library, that's ridiculous. Nathan says a brutal diary his grandmother wrote about her trip to the Amazon. Her crew was killed and eaten and her husband Walter was out there somewhere. She found the cannibals on her trip, fell in lust with a native man and after they ate she realized Walter was in the soup she just had eaten. Pickles says that's totally Cannibal Corpse. Nathan says we are going to the Amazon.
    Crozier is brought into Salacia's lair where Vata is waiting. "General Crozier, thank you for coming." What's this about? "Like you we are very concerned about this Amazon trip and we feel we need someone on the ground to take action in case something out of the ordinary occurs." I can have my men mobilized in 24 hours. "I already have my best soldiers set to accompany you." I prefer to use mine. "Surely you understand the importance of keeping an eye on you too General Crozier." Salacia says to leave at once.
    The band goes to an outfitter store. Skwis and Toki and want magic guitars and try to outdo each other with what they ask for. They want them to glow and point the way and tell them what way is north or south. Skwis says stops copies me. Pickles wants to bring worms for fishing, then says snakes are the biggest worms out there and Charles says there are plenty of snakes in the Amazon. Pickles calls him a penny pincher. Skwis & Toki keep saying stops copies me. Murderface eats jerky and says it's awesome and Nathan wants him to close his mouth while he talks and can't understand him anyway. Murderface says he'll starve then. Charles wants them to just send the natives hoodies. Nathan says it's always hoodies with him and to pay the bill.
    They fly down there in a large convoy and Murderface is reading about an Amazonian catfish that can swim up your pee and lay eggs in your penis and Pickles doesn't want to hear it since he's trying to eat. He says it's a horrible combination of bad info and beef jerky breath. Murderface says fine, you've been warned. Crozier's men follow them, but are caught and the Dethklok chopper launches missiles and takes out the pilots, but Crozier and others parachute to safety. The roadies are told to clear a landing zone and spray a huge area with machine gun fire. All of Croziers men are there and most are gunned down. Also all kinds of wildlife are killed. They stop only to reload and drop the Dethboat in the water, not even using the landing zone.
    Nathan rides on the front of the boat down the Amazon starting from the ocean, through Brazil. Crozier watches them. Murderface is on the deck totally nude lounging and loving the wind. Skwis and Pickles come up and are so disgusted at him and want him to put his pants on. He says they are repressed. They say his penis is so gnarled and looks like it was stung by hornets. He says he happens to play bass with it and it's calloused. Then he says he has to pee before he puts his clothes and he goes over the side. They say oh gross now they see his ass and it's all hairy and cottage cheese like. Then the parasites enter him and he screams and the boat crashes.
    A roadie tells Nathan the boat can't fit with the equipment down the river. Nathan tells them they can't abandon the equipment and to pull it over the mountain. At the top they lose it and the boat goes flying down the other side killing roadies, crashes and the natives capture them. Nathan says my people and behind them is a mountain with figures carved like them.
    That night they are around a campfire and all say they can't be killed because they have things to live for. Murderface has his parasites and Skwis says he had to play guitar for little dildos, Toki says the same thing and they start arguing again. Crozier and his men watch and see that something is happening. Pickles is excited they are getting the Yopu so they'll die high. They spray the drug in their face and don't kill them. It enables them to play a concert where they unleash their animal spirits - octopus, tiger, eagle, lizard and rabbit hybrid. Then Crozier and his men are sprayed and they start to hallucinate. He sees the Cardinal who says he's dead and the others start to bleed and are cooked and eaten.

Dethgov

    Nathan is in second grade and becomes class president, but he won't say anything and the teacher asks him to. A police chase is going on outside and the redneck drunk driver says he's a lunatic of god's creation and gets shot in the eye and his truck crashes into the school room and covers Nathan with the classes blood.
    Present day. On the TV there is a report Governor Kip Slaughter of Florida is in trouble because he's trashing Nathan. He says Nathan's just a musician, not a war hero, he's a disgrace, he won't give Nathan a holiday. Dethklok's fans start attacking him with bricks and he falls over and a reporter describes the scene. "Ladies and gentlemen this is the strangest sight I've ever seen. The governor is being hoisted in the air upside down. His daughter has just spit on him. It looks like 2 men with machetes…oh my god, I don't believe this, I've never seen a sight like this. Pieces of his flesh are being torn away and the name Dildo is written on his forehead. The headless corpse, ladies and gentlemen, the governor is dead." Pickles thinks it's cool, Nathan doesn't even pay attention. Charles says Nathan has been asked by the president to give a speech to stop them from killing him. He's eating chips and doesn't want to be bothered. He finally agrees to speak, but asks what am I supposed to say. He said I shouldn't have a holiday? Screw him. The fans rip his limbs off, stab him with a pitchfork and hang him up.
    On Channel 57 the reporter says, "Riots and violence have hampered the special election due to the murder of Governor Kip Slaughter. Gangs of rabid fans are insisting on Nathan Explosion for governor."
    The band is in the train and Charles says the governor is dead because of Nathan's remarks. He didn't say to kill him, the fans are loyal. The band is mad he never takes their side, what about their feelings? So you feel bad the governor was ripped apart? No, they feel bad they have to play in humidity, it's hard to play when their hands sweat. Charles says Florida is in a violent state of anarchy, do you care? No one says anything. He says he tried.
    On the TV the reporter says, "A landslide write-in victory. Nathan Explosion is the governor of Florida. Nathan Explosion the next governor of Florida. Nathan Explosion, governor of Florida."
    The senator says it looks like Nathan is the next governor. Crozier says it's an outrage, how can they stop it. Vata says, "Consider what the people would do General Crozier." The senator says they should go to purple alert and then a loud alarm goes off and they all look at each other.
    They pull up to Florida and Nathan says to imagine governing that mob, he'd have to live in Florida. Charles says not to tell the angry mob he doesn't want the job, look what they did to the last one. Nathan is pissed and Toki says it would be great. Pickles says not to be stupid, Murderface says he would have to fill out forms and papers and wear a suit like a dildo, no offense Charles. Skwiz says he's stupid. Toki says he could be cool and fix things and not complain about things. Charles says you would be powerful. Nathan says oh really, he can put his friends in charge, line his pockets with money and go mad with power? Charles says technically he can. Murderface wants to be head of the Nation Guard, Nathan says he's got it. Toki wants to help people, he's got it. Murderface wants a secretary. Pickles wants to be ambassador to China, Skwiz wants no part of it, it's crap. Pickles says they have all these old ladies that need him. Murderface says he can take care of old ladies. He says he'll do that.
    Nathan takes the job and wants to hear their guns and all the people start firing and the state logo becomes a gun, street signs get spikes and skulls, police cars look like Road Warrior machines.
    Toki says he's going to make things right and do good, but first he has to get his office in order. He orders his secretary to move his can of stuff on the desk. The headline reads "Murderface calls National guard to blow crap up." The next magazine shows Pickles as ambassador. Then he's in a strip club with 3 Chinese men and says welcome to my country, this is how we do it and he has a woman giving him a lap dance. Over 60 magazine says Skwigelf sexes up the Gmilfs! He's seen in bed with 3 old ladies.
    Nathan says every poor idiot will become rich because we are going to print more money, why didn't anyone think of this before? Roadies toss money out of cars onto the street and the headline reads "New Florida currency worthless!" It has a $666 bill with Nathan on it. The next paper reads "Nathan destroys millions of Florida Jobs!" because working sucks. Then "Crime up 20,000 percent!" Meanwhile Toki is still having the guy move his can. Skwis is making out with the old ladies, Murderface is in a police car with his secretary servicing him, a liquor store owner guards his place with a gun and prices are through the roof like $150,000 for chips. Alligator attacks are on the rise, anarchy as police leave the state, schools burn, morgues overflow, more mayhem. Pickles in the strip club parking lot trying to deal with a stripper who OD'ed.
    They all come to Nathan in the governor's mansion which is in shambles. Murderface is on the radio screaming about no cops and chaos, Pickles says he has a little problem, people are screaming, there is no police. Nathan says it doesn't look good for his administration.
    Dethklok gives a benefit concert for Florida, but as they play a hurricane comes in and disrupts it. They go to the weather center and Nathan doesn't know he was there. He wants them to blow up the hurricane. They can't. Blow it off course. They can't. Nathan says that's it, they tried everything. Murderface says they haven't. He says well not literally. Charles says to activate the emergency system. The guys hate that beeping thing. The man says the broadcast was stolen anyway. They wonder how anyone could steal the beep. What do you guys do here anyway? We name the hurricane, do you want to name it? Nathan says Scrambles the Death Dealer.
    The name sticks, it hits the state and is so brutal that it rips people up and pulls their skin off. After it's over the state is a wasteland. Nathan ends his term and gives a speech and there's only 1 person left. He says he hopes he left the state better than when he found it, then says screw it and leaves. The man from his second grade police chase is running again, this time with an eye patch. Cops shoot him again. A man in a wheelchair is under a giant statue of Nathan and says best governor they ever had and a man shoots him in the head.

Dethrace

    Murderface is playing the national anthem for NASCAR. He says it's an honor to be here, you are all my children. He says get ready for playing with his penis and the shot goes to his hairy ass. Nathan and Pickles are watching it on TV and Pickles wants to turn it off. Nathan says we promised to watch it. Then it turns to breaking news of a police chase with Skwisgaar and Toki. They are drunk while shooting at the police helicopter and crash. The entertainment TV reporter who got hit by the comet is back with a burned face talking about the crash. Officer James Goatwhore planned on shooting them until they heard it was Dethklok.
    They are found not guilty if they go to driving school, get their licenses and do community service. Murderface's performance was preempted by the coverage. He's sulking that he wants the spotlight once, just once. He knows he's nothing, he should stand behind the amp so album sales will go up. Skwisgaar and Toki are upset they have to plan a live event, go to school and don't want community service. Charles says Murderface has been locked in his room for 3 days and they should have Murderface produce the event for them. Skwisgaar says fine, then they won't have to do it. Charles asks Nathan and Pickles to weigh in, but they aren't interested.
    Nathan drives Skwisgaar & Toki to driving school in the murdercycle like he's their dad giving them advice. Skwisgaar says he bets he'll be better and they fight about it. Then Toki runs over to the school and gets hit by a car.
    Murderface describes the event he wants as a NASCAR type hybrid car race vent. Charles says it's a race. No. He wants to do a car race, but not just that, an event. It's like medieval times. With horses and knights? No. Maybe. Pickles says he'll help, Murderface's trying to tell him something about something. Charles asks what it has to do with Dethklok. They are Dethklok. He means the music. It's not about music.
    The senator says Dethklock is sponsoring their own race vent. They turn it over to their Murderface expert who says he's frightened, stupid and perfect example of devolution. Everything is wrong with him - chicken legs, bad skin, no concentration and is bi-polar, etc.
    Skwisgaar & Toki are in school and the teacher is Japanese. They think there is something weird with this class. The teacher says he will show them a vintage brutal film called Crash Site on the Corner of Blood Street and Guts Circle. It shows car crashes with decapitations and lots of blood. It has lines like 'you weren't meant to drink and drive or you would be born with a smashed face.' They are horrified.
    Charles meets with Murderface. He thinks he's very lax and isn't ready for the press conference in 5 minutes. Murderface just agrees with everything he says. It's the Associated Press, they are confused about the event.
    Toki is driving and can't make the turn into traffic and starts crying while Skwisgaar watches from the back seat.
    Murderface is totally nervous before he's supposed to go out and speak so Pickles gives him a pill. Nathan says that wasn't good, he'll be a sloppy mess. He goes out and speaks and just drools and mumbles. Nathan knew it was bad, but doesn't really care, they want to make him crap his pants.
    Skwisgaar & Toki both fail the test and don't understand why. The teacher says Toki wouldn't drive and Skwisgaar wouldn't even sit in the front seat. They keep saying driving is scary. They curse each other out and don't know what to do, they are supposed to drive in the NASCAR event.
    Murderface's NASCAR-Type Hybrid Event begins with the band playing. Then a wizard speaks of all the racers who are knights and the colors of the cars. Murderface is still out of it and is crawling down the track on his ass. Cars swerve to avoid him and crash into the stands and explode killing people. Skwisgaar & Toki drive a double neck guitar car over a ramp that crashes into the huge fire breathing dragon and its flames shoot into the crowd and the stadium burns. Murderface is on stage with his pants down and Nathan & Pickles mock him.

The Revengencers

    An ad for Norwegian Black and Blood Coffee in collectible Dethklok skull mugs for $14 each plays inside a Duncan Hills Coffee shop. One teenage guy wants to buy one, but doesn't have the money. His asks to borrow the money from friends. One says no, the other says he can use his parents Duncan Hills credit card and he offers his parents Hot Topic card in return. A fat guy brags he was at the original Dethklok funeral massacre fest, used all his kids' college fund to get there and lost 3 fingers to frostbite. Another guy says his sister didn't like them so he made her drink motor oil and she got sick. He says whatever, call me when you get a real story. A guy then puts a backpack under a seat and runs out . It then blows up the store and body parts fly out.
    The Duncan Hills spokesman gives a press conference saying the odds of another gas explosion are so remote, so come back, it's totally safe.
    The counsel says the bombings are deliberate, not accidental. Crozier says surveillance video shows the fat Jomfru brother Edgar at the scene and another a boy wearing the dead skin mask of his brother Eric. Vata says, "The Jomfru brothers have been missing since international fan day, it's rumored they are in Mordhaus." Crozier says Edgar is the brains behind The Revengencers. Vata asks, "And the gentleman with the silver face?" He was seen at Mordhaus recently, so if he wants Dethklok dead, he can make it happen.
    A donate to the Duncan Hills relief fund PSA plays. A man with no legs says the victims of these natural gas coincidence explosions need your help, even I had my legs blown off. Charles says they are raising money for a hospital for the victims of the disaster. Nathan says it's pandering, Murderface agrees. Skwisgaar says it wasn't their fault. Charles says it is a benefit for those injured who are their fans, some injured, some killed buying their collectible cups. No one cares. Nathan has no sympathy because he has a summer cold, where's his benefit concert, is there anything worse? Murderface says you can relate to that, not getting your arms blown off. Charles says it's worse than losing your legs. Nathan doesn't buy it. Skwisgaar thinks Charles is drunk for caring so much. He's trying to repair their image. They can't believe he'd do that with something so lame as health care. They all complain and Nathan's head pounds over it. Murderface says his throat is getting scratchy. Pickles says they are hard to get rid off, Toki thinks he's got it too, then Murderface sneezes.
    Edgar is in a warehouse with the assassin. He wants to kill Charles and make an example of him. Edgar says to be patient. The assassin says if he's out of the way Dethklok has no one to hide behind. Then they can kill the band when they play at the hospital.
    The band is at the doctor's office and the doctor says it's just a cold, haven't you ever had colds before? Nathan thinks he's dying, they all think they are sick and want injections. He tells them not to drink, no partying, no smoking, go to the sauna, take it easy and sweat it out, idiots.
    They go to the sauna and Nathan says it's hot. Toki says it's supposed to be, it's a sauna. Pickles snuck booze in for some shots, but Toki says they weren't supposed to drink. Doctors don't know anything. Murderface has a book on medieval cures. He says they have to put a baby under a horse 3 times and they are cured, the doctor doesn't know anything. Then Pickles says they need leeches, he saw it in a documentary. So they all get leeches and put them all over and say they are Elvis, the guy with the mask in the Natalie Portman movie, a NFL player and Charlie Chaplain. Nathan tells Murderface to do leech Al Jolson and he covers his face with them. They don't think it's working, so they should up the ante with some bloodletting to drain the bad blood and regenerate it with good blood. They cut their arms and bleed into buckets and all of them feel bad, get weak and pass out. They have to get transfusions after. Charles asks them if they are ready for the concert.
    They go to the hospital and greet bloody, bandaged people and they can't hear them. Edgar is outside in the van. Nathan says he's sick and the concert won't be any good. Pickles says it's a free show, it doesn't matter. He says they are all sick, but can't remember Toki's name and they should only do 1 song. They play a song called Pull the Plug to get out of paying the medical bills to the crowd of wounded fans. Edgar lines up his sniper rifle to kill the band and the battered and bloody fans start attacking for them trying to kill Dethklok. He doesn't understand why they would save them since Dethklok made them this way. One armless man bites his nose off. The assassin comes in and attacks Charles, but he's able to jump out a window to escape. The assassin carries the fake brother away as Roadies fire on him. He escapes and they kill some of the sick people. The assassin drives the van away with the bloody Edgar and the fake Eric.

Klokblocked

    On an ET type show they are talking about the band and who they are dating. Remember Rebecca Knightrod? Nathan stayed with her while she was in a coma. They even went to a red carpet event while she was in a hospital bed. Then she cheated on him with millionaire hotel owner Walt Perkins. Nathan plays golf in a lightning storm and the guys tell him to forget her. They are wet, freezing and want to hang out again. He says she was perfect. They remind him she was in a coma, he was infatuated with her unconsciousness. He wants to start dating again.
    They read the paper and the headline is Waltbecca! Toki calls her a slut. Murderface says not to call her names, you have to respect women. They can't believe him, he's a classic womanhater. He says it's disappointing to blindly label him. Skwisgaar says he calls women vipers with tits. He admits he's pretending to be sensitive to get women to sleep with him. They knew he had an angle. Nathan says he's going to bring woman around, so don't mess it up for him. They don't understand, they are a good thing.
    Nathan puts up an eharmony type dating page. He likes metal and chips, that's it. The counsel meets about Nathan being officially single. Crozier says word has gotten out and woman are in chaos rioting for his attention. Vata says, "And now these woman are doing everything that they can to get Nathan Explosions' attention." Crozier says the biggest problem is the group Succuboso Explosion led by Lavona Succuboso who wants to capture him and breed him with their female followers. They will probably arrive at the next concert with the power to rid the world of Nathan.
    The guys play scrabble and don't even use real words, but no one challenges it. Nathan brings over his first girl Rachel. The guys decide to help him out by being overly nice to her. They say how good she looks, feels, will take care of her and how Nathan's rude to not introduce them. They ask if she wants to play a game with them. Nathan screams she doesn't want to play. He wants to go upstairs and hang out. They say they can hang with them. He wants it quiet. They say they can be quiet. He screams and agrees to play.
    The Succuubs group meets leatherclad in their lair. They want to capture Nathan, steal his seed and create a race of explosionites. They have a life size dummy of Nathan for their loin extractor test. It's a gun that launches a claw into his crotch and shocks him.
    The guys play scrabble with the girl while Nathan watches. They applaud her use of the word aquarium. Nathan has had enough and wants to go bed.
    In a bar Toki wants to text Rachel, he say hi for all of them. Nathan sits alone is dejected. Murderface goes over to 2 women who dread him doing so. He says he's protecting them from harm and keeping them safe. Toki says no one is bothering them. Skwisgaar comes over and then they get all hot for him when they recognize him and he says he knows them. Murderface gets mad, he was there fist. Skwisgaar says he laid claim to them. They say no way, he hates women. Murderface says who said that, whoever says that he will beat the crap out of. They said it, what are you going to do, beat us up? Aren't you the bass player, why are we talking to you? Shouldn't you be unloading equipment, putting water bottles on the stage. He is floored and says it's the foundation of the band. They say make like a bass guitar and be inaudible.
    Nathan brings over Amanda his new girl and introduces her. Rachel is there with the guys and Nathan asks why. They get along with her and invited her over. Nathan says that's not weird, I'm here with a new date and there's the old one. They like her so much, how can she be the old one? Toki gets him alone asks what is he dong, what about Rachel? He says he only dated her once. Are you breaking up with her? It wasn't a relationship. They can be with her now? They are taking a Chinese cooking class with her. Why did you do that!? Because she is wonderful, you can't break up. Nathan wants them out of his life.
    Then a montage of Nathan and his new women and the guys getting in between them all the time is shown.
    Charles meets with Nathan about his girl troubles, he wanted to give him a shoulder to...then he says he looks fine, he tried and walks out.
    The guys have all the old girls together and say how beautiful and wonderful they are and Nathan isn't good enough for them, he doesn't know what he wants. Nathan asks what's going on here, you guys are cockblocking me, if you want women, go get your own, don't take mine. Murderface is guilty, then stands by Nathan yelling at the guys. Nathan says tonight is the first concert since Rebecca left him and there will be lots of women there. If anyone of you gets in his way he will literally kill them.
    The band plays and the crowd is lined with scantily clad women. In the middle the Succubus women are gathered. Lavona flips over them and fires their loin extractor at Nathan. Murderface warns Nathan who doesn't see it and jumps in front of it and it catches his bass. He gets electrocuted, but the charge also electrocutes the woman. Nathan says he never knew a cockblock could save his life, thanks. Murderface says that's OK, now he's a real hero.

Dethsources

Dethdad

    The band blows up amps with guns and use a catapult to launch guitars outside. Nathan won't give Murderface firecrackers when he asks and Pickles says they are in the grass he just has to find them and when he bends over to look Nathan drops one in his buttcrack and lights it. Murderface gets mad and they tell him to keep looking in the grass and do it again and again. Nathan then throws fireworks at him and one blows up in his crotch. Toki gets a call and learns his dad has cancer and is dying.
    Back inside Skwisgaar tells Toki his dad has the Big K and tells him to stop staring at him and to just say something. He walks over and moves Toki's lips and talks for him. He says he doesn't have a father, he doesn't need one. He goes back and forth with himself and winds up pissing himself off with his own talk. He wants to be alone and ugly.
    The guys are in the kitchen talking about Toki how he's in bad shape. They are worried about him getting guns. They don't think he'll kill himself. They are worried he would kill them, he's freaky. He appears and they get paranoid. He says he's going to Norway to see his dad die. The guys say to say hi to his dad unless he dies, if he does die, say hi to his corpse, no matter what. Toki says they can go with him. They have to make the album, they can't go. Charles tries to get them to work, but they won't do it and play video games instead. They get annoyed at him for being so cold and decide to go support Toki after all.
    The senator says Toki's dad is going to die. They have an expert come in who says everything Toki touches dies. He's like the grim reaper with a guitar. Vata eyes Crozier. The counsel thinks he's full of it. The expert says he suppressed his feelings all this time. His father's death could unleash his anger, he could kill us all.
    On the way to Norway they are bowling on their plane. Nathan says Norway is the birthplace of death metal, it's going to be fun. Murderface doesn't care, his dad killed his mom and himself and he's fine. They say he was a baby then. He says he was never a baby. They all talk about not caring about their dads, except for Nathan, he likes drinking with him and would be sad if he died. He gives Murderface a firecracker to hold and it blows up in his hand. They all laugh. He says that's his bass playing hand. Pickles says the band is over now.
    They are taking 5 man snowmobile sled to Toki's place, but they don't know how to get there. Toki says it's complicated, let's go shopping. They agree, so they go into town and look for death metalheads, but the only one is a kid. He takes them to the first ever death metal store. The cashier won't even stock Dethklok albums because they are too digital. He's wearing makeup and plays demo tapes of his band. If they like it, he doesn't like it. They think he's a real jerk.
    They go to eat and the town is so boring. It has the lowest murder rate in the world. They can't believe even Canada is more brutal than this, it's lame. They want to see his dad die, that's brutal.
    They go to the house and Toki won't go in and stands outside for 3 hours while they are freezing. Toki wanders off into the snow and has visions of brutal treatment from when he was a kid. He sings a children's song about himself until he clears his mind and is ready to go inside. They guys don't want to, they'll wait for him outside. His family is there and his dad tells him his last request is to see the house where he was born. They drive out there and Toki has to carry him up a huge mountain because they won't drive up there. Toki forgives him for everything he did to him. Right before he gets in he trips on a step and his dad slides down the mountain and into the water and sinks under the ice as Toki watches. Murderface throws a firework and it causes the snow to bury the house.

Snakes and Barrels II

The first double length episode

    The band is watching the TV show 'Where are they now now? Snakes and Barrels' When everyone thought they were done for good, they reunited, then overdosed, then came back with new singer Rikki Kix. He cleaned them up at his Kikkin' it Rehab Center, they needed to get cleaned up, their problem was Pickles. They will head the Sober Rock Fest with Rockso, they are bringing sober back, the future of Rock and Roll.
    Pickles asks Charles how did this happen, it's my band and they are sober? Charles says he doesn't own the name Snakes N Barrels. How did this happen without me? They were around before you got there, before I represented you. Pickles starts smashing lamps. Can you stop breaking my lamps, break the ones over there from Ikea. Pickles relents and says you have a lot of lamps in here. Lighting is important. Pickles says I want to talk to them. You can't, they have a restraining order against you. Damn it! He breaks more lamps. Charles asks the roadies for more lamps. Toki arrives and he wants to break lamps too. Murderface follows. He wants to talk now, he is worried about someone stealing the name Planet Piss on him. Charles in the middle of a meeting. He keeps whining until he can speak. Charles says just register the name. I did that, what if they steal it from me. I want to make t-shirts and stuff. Charles says OK, we can talk about that, but we'll talk about it later. We are done? Yes we are done. They keep breaking lamps and a roadie arrives with more lamps to break. Nathan and Skwisgaar want to be in on the meeting. What is it a lamp meeting? Sort of. Nathan wants to know who owns the name Dethklok. You should know, all 5 of you own it. Good. Pickles wants to know where they are now. The band says on the TV in the other room. He keeps asking where they are now. They keep saying on the TV. Charles doesn't recommend him going to see them. He finally says they are in LA.
    The senator explains that Snakes are reuniting again again without Pickles. They tried to control them with a drug last time that affected the band, but Pickles was immune. Vata says, "It was a total fiasco. " Their expert briefs them that the drugs side effect is it will shoot phosphorescent snakes out of every orifice. Vata says, "All of the orifices?" Yes, let's hope we are wrong.
    Rockso gives a speech to a group and he blames all his drug use on the clown. Rikki says you will be tempted, we have the power to make RNR sober forever.
    On the way to LA, Toki buys the name Planet Piss online to steal it from Murderface. The guys say to make sure to get all the domain names. They ask if they knows web design. He says he's got a program.
    Rikki is told by an aide the concert is sold out. He wants to make a toast, then says he can't and he fights it. Sobriety is a living hell, he can't drink, his liver is shot and the police are randomly checking him. The aide asks why do you want others to be sober? Because if I can't drink, then no one else can, there is the truth, you can't tell anyone. Don't worry master, I won't tell anyone. That's right you won't. He then chokes him and breaks his neck.
    The band arrives in Hollywood and Toki is excited. Pickles says he'll show them around. He shows the clubs he used to play with guys shooting dope and girls dancing. Murderface thought they were long haired pussies. Pickles says I'm not saying they weren't. He shows them pictures of a guy who died, one guy who thought he was doing coke, but it was angel dust. He shot cops, jumped off the Capitol Records building and lived. Four sluts in a band used to live in this dumpster. One singer blew a guy right there, it was me. They are shocked and he admits he was joking. They say the town is messed up, everyone there is stupid. Pickles says drugs and alcohol are being phased out of the Rock N Roll they love. They have a responsibility to change this. Toki asks what's wrong with being sober. He'll go to the show and have fun. Murderface gets mad he says you spilled soda on my shorts and he has to go change. The band has to wear disguises to sneak into the concert. There are warning signs not let Pickles in. One guy is kicked out for having drugs.
A man introduces Rockso on stage. He says he's sober, you know how to rock sober style, it's his first time on stage sober. He starts seeing visions of the clown offering him drugs. He says it's good to be here, then starts flipping out and waving the visions away. The crowd wonders what's going on. Rikki yells at him to introduce the opening band Manhattan Sidewinder. Nathan says this blows and Skwisgaar says let's get wasted beyond belief. They ask, but Toki doesn't want anything. Pickles sneaks backstage by offering security $10,000 cash. He finds his band and can't believe they restarted the band without him. They met Rikki and things happened. They are clean, making money, his hat fits better. Pickles says we've known each other forever and Rikki doesn't care about you at all like I do, you may be sober but you are still stupid idiot scumbags. Rikki catches him and they throw him out. Pickles is mad because it's the same guy he bribed. Rockso finds the cocaine they confiscated at the door and starts twitching.
    Nathan and Skwisgaar goes to the bar and wants something to drink. They have shots, water shots, do you have alcohol? Better, we have apples. He asks them to come closer and he starts smacking then, don't ever mess with me and alcohol. Meanwhile a loud screaming guy is in Toki's face and he tells him to get out of his space.
    Murderface is on the bus changing and goes to a laptop to register Plant Piss and finds Toki took them all and has a page with pictures of Murderface naked with animals. He finds it says this site owned by Toki and flips.
    Up front the loud screaming man is getting in Toki's face for the last time. He says that's it I'm kicking your ass you loud stupid a-hole and starts pounding him. The band starts reacting to the drugs and the snakes come out of their mouths and start enveloping the crowd. Murderface comes after Toki and starts screaming he's going to kill him. Pickles gets out on stage and asks what's going on and starts pounding Rikki. The snakes go into the crowd and a rabbit appears and babies come out of it and start feeding the crowd booze.     Murderface wants a piece of Toki, then sees him pounding the guy and is covered in blood and backs off. Toki asks what does he want mofo. Rocko takes the cocaine, attacks a girl that comes in, rips off her top and comes out on stage in blood and says I'm the rock and roll clown and I love cocaine.
(Ad for new episode) C&N reporter (Malcolm) "The world is still waiting, where is the new Dethklok album?"

Dethrecord

    C&N reporter, "The world is still waiting, where is the new Dethklok album? There have been many delays and the fans are restless. Some fans have threatened to detonate a stolen nuclear device if they don't hear word of a new album soon. The tension is thick and the world could erupt into violence at any time. Dethklok has promised us a deadline, god help us all if they fail to meet it." The ticker on the bottom says they are looking for a concert site and the government says no structure can withstand the 10 megaton blast from the stolen bomb. Mt. Rushmore is vandalized to look like Dethklok and 'when?' is spray painted on it.
    60 days left - Pickles is playing wildly and they say it's not recording. He can't believe it. He does it again and Nathan says to do it better. Pickles wants to smash his face, he says that's better think about smashing faces. They get food and Pickles is mad, he smells French toast. Nathan says there isn't any as he's eating. Then he admits there is food. The producer says he's the only one complaining.
Skwisgaar is playing, but there is a buzzing and he doesn't know why. The producer says to give his guitar to a roadie and he doesn't understand why. The roadie holds it and it doesn't buzz. The producer asks Skwisgaar to touch it now. With what? A finger. He does and it buzzes. He then jumps up with the guitar and it doesn't buzz. He thinks he's screwed. The producer says he has an idea.
    Nathan is trying to write lyrics. He wants to find something to rhyme with murder, but it's hard. A roadie says he has a package from England for him. Where? Camelot. Perfect, now he can record.
    Murderface and Toki are outside and want to write their own songs while the others are blocked. What is there to write about? Plenty, food. Toki says to write about taking it easy. He says to get paper and write this down.
    Nathan tries to sing in a suit of armor and it clanks all over the whole time. He wants them to just erase it from the mix. The producer is trying. He wants everyone to wear armor, but they don't think it's a good idea.
    They call it a wrap and Skwisgaar is going out. He's going to record his part, the most dangerous thing he's ever done. He jumps out of a helicopter and plays guitar on the way down as roadies hold the amps behind him. Toki is in the studio and hits a button that erases the recording Skwisgaar just made. He panics and tries to rerecord Skwisgaar's parts over in the studio.
    Skwisgaar wants to hear it and Toki says he'll take him out to lunch. He plays it and sounds like crap and Toki cracks that he ruined it. The producer says he should've backed it up and Toki agrees. This means he has to jump again to record it and he does.
    Charles says Murderface and Toki recorded a song they want the band to hear, just say you like it. They go to listen and they have it on a boom box and Murderface wants them to have hot towels. They don't want them. He plays the tape, it's about Takin' it Easy. They say not taking? Takin' with a '. They play it and it's really weak, they have a video of them flying the Hindenburg and crashing it, then Murderface pilots the Titanic and sinks it. They say it's good. Murderface says it'll go on the new record as the opening track. No. They say it's not good, it's not Dethklok. Murderface flips out and curses and screams. He's going to put it on his Planet Piss album then. Toki says he's in Plant Piss then. No, you greedy bastard, it's mine. Toki threatens to throw the hot towels on him then. Murderface gets scared and says that's not a good idea. Why not? Because they are hot.
    The band goes into a marathon recording session. A reporter outside says, "Millions of Dethklok fans have gathered around Mordhaus, they are waiting for the chimney smoke to turn from white to black. This will mean the new album is complete."

Dethrelease

The season finale is also double length.

    Ch57 news says, "Paranoia runs rampant in the Midwest as gangs destroyed a truck terminal because rumors of Dethklok's new album is in the warehouse." A female newsperson says a new military leader has vowed to fight terrorism on the homefront. The entertainment show says Dethklok is throwing a major record release party for a new CD and 40,000 fans will see a concert at an undisclosed location. Meanwhile Skwisgaar & Toki are watching internet porn. They didn't think they could do that position. Hey Toki are you drinking straight vodka? Get off my back. It's not even 12. Are you big f-king Ben? Nathan asks if you are watching that guy suck his own thing? Yes. I would never leave the house if I could do that. Skwisgaar says I would never leave the house, I would never be in a band or play guitar. That's the whole reason we are in a band. Pickles comes down in a bathrobe and asks if they are watching that. He says he was just trying it, he wouldn't be a drummer if he could do it, he would just stay at home. He also gives Toki a hard time about drinking. Toki tells him this will all lead to disappointment, stop talking about it. Murderface comes down yelling it's a fire drill, everybody out. Nobody listens or moves. He says they are all dead now. Who put you in charge? He ran for it and won. Nathan says you ran unopposed, what does it matter? He says it still counts, but they have no interest in what he says.
    Vata, "Crozier is now chief of all military operations." They are watching on TV where Crozier is made chief of state. Mr. Salacia says our influence will soon be his. "We are entering a dangerous time master." The balance is shifting. "How should we proceed with General Crozier?" I will enlighten him "And Dethklok?" The time will come, we will ship out soon.
    Charles says we have a lot to talk about, the exclusive concert, CD release party here, most of all security. Nathan says watch what he just learned in the shower and does a voice like Charles and they are all amazed. Pickles says he can do a trumpet with his voice and they love it. Charles asks if they are going to continue. Murderface says he's stepping down as fire chief. Nathan wants to hire a Buddhist instructor yoga guy dude. They like it. Charles says he wants spiritual counsel? Yeah, right guys. They want to be able to reach things, conversation over.
    At the UN - Dethklok they are now the 7th largest power on the world. They think the album would save the world, but the problem is the Revengencers have grown by 1000s, they have slaves and are worried they have a new weapon using soundwaves. All countries are worried. The senator and the general promise they will be stopped.
    The Revengencers have a meeting, their motto was die for Dethklok, but now they have the power to make Dethklok die for them. They show that they have a glowing bomb.
    The guys are in all in their gym except for Toki. They don't want to do it together, it seems homoerotic. Nathan wants Murderface to go first. They bend him over naked to suck himself and Nathan says to stop, it's really gay. Toki comes in and wants them to wait for him. He falls down the stairs and they put him in the shower. They say there is something wrong with him lately. Nathan says band rule is never to get involved with other members personal lives. They say they aren't helping him, if they don't get too involved it's not helping, it might hurt him and that's cool. Well, that's getting too close to butting in, let it go. It is funny when he falls though. OK. Nathan says no more trying to suck their own thing, it's gay and not metal, that's all we need. Agreed. Toki gets up and falls over and they laugh.
    The succubus girls meet with Revengencers, they want Nathan first, then they can do what they want with him.
    Charles has a meeting with the roadies. He wants to know where the assassin is. They can't find them. He asks the picture where are you? He meets with an elite group and says it will be the most dangerous day of their lives, protect everyone especially the band and make sure the record release goes right. The shuttle is ready.
    They are all ready to go, but the band isn't ready. They look for them and find all the guys are trying to suck themselves in bed and hurt their backs, except for Toki who is passed out. They all mock him after. Get a chiropractor.
    News around the world is about the CD release party. The day is now more popular than New Year's. 40,000 lucky fans are being brought to the secret concert. They are wondering where the concert will be.
    They are brought out to a desert and rocket ships emerge from silos under the earth. One launches in stages and folds open like a Hellraiser cube in the sky and the band plays on it. It keeps unfolding as Revengencers monitor, as does the General Crozier. The fans are on other flying platforms nearby as the band plays in the air
    After they land for a party and Nathan gets out saying just another douchebag industry party. Charles tells them not to get too wasted. They say it's a party. Just pace yourselves, not like Toki who is sloshed. The label owners son wants to ask Skwisgaar some questions. He says he will be the best guitarist ever. That's great. He asks questions about how many guitars and strings he takes with him. He blows him off until he asks about wireless. Skwisgarr says that's interesting, but the kid doesn't care and has to go. Roadies have the master recording they are taking to a vault and the guys make jokes about it. The producer wants hugs. Meanwhile the Revengencers are making their way in by the pipes. It's an invasion, the shield goes down and the power goes off. Charles organizes the elites to protect the band and release spiders to blow up intruders. Everything is now on fire. Murderface takes over as fire chief and talks like the Terminator come with me if you want to live. The producer tells Skwisgaar and Pickles to save the master and they are confused. The master recording! Nathan finds Toki passed out in the smoke and saves him by carrying him out. Outside he meets the succubus leader.
    Skwisgaar & Pickles meet up with 3 assassins. They fight with them using guitars and fists and beat them. Skwisgaar marvels that the neck is still straight on his axe. Nathan meets with the succubus. He asks what does the crazy bitch wants. She says this, kisses him, then knees him in the groin. Nathan goes down, she moves in and Toki takes her out with a bottle. Charles leads roadies on flying scooters against the assassins' thugs. They fight, shoot lasers and kill each other. A woman thanks Murderface for saving all their lives, but he's just doing his job. Nathan says too bad she was so crazy, she was so hot. Toki says all the hot ones are, so are the ugly ones. He carries him down and says I'm only telling you because you won't remember. You've been really messed up lately. Toki says you are telling me because you care? No and don't throw up.
    Charles and the Assassin go in through tunnel chase. The fake Eric shoots him with an arrow and he goes down. Crozier takes Eric down, then Vata and Mr. Salacia show up. Salacia makes General remember all the horrors he's seen and he becomes like a zombie.
Skwisgaar and Pickles are trapped by Edgar and think they are dead. Pickles just wants to tell him he sucked himself last night and can die happy. Then Edgar has visions of him and Eric together when they loved Dethklok and this gives roadies enough time to come over and take him out.
    The assassin cuts and beats Charles. He tells him he wants him to be alive while he tortures him. Nathan beats him with a fiery log. That's my bread and butter you are f-king with. Then the band stands there together, they have all survived as the fire rages on all around them.

My Reviews

Dethecution

    This is one of the few new shows I never miss. I first started watching it because of Mark Hamill who is one of the best living voice actors there is. After one viewing I was hooked and watched it because it is a funny show. Each episode is only 11 minutes long with no commercial breaks. The story centers on the world's most popular band Dethklok that are worth billions and are massively popular. This creates a problem as the things they say or do can influence millions and kill 1000s. Because of this a secret Tribunal of powerful leaders from politics, the military and the church was set up to control the band by outside influence to better themselves. At the end of the first season they decided the band must be destroyed while giving their only performance of The Dethwater Album that was only for sea creatures on a platform in the North Sea. Their manager Charles got wind of this and protected them, though their stage and equipment were destroyed. At the same time two of their major enemies were killed or knocked out. Season 2 opens with the General being brought back, but it seems the cardinal is dead. The band meanwhile is hiding out because they don't want to go out and tour anymore for fear they will be killed by fans as they are unaware of the secret society hunting for them. This is causing chaos around the world.
    Belmer sounds like Malcolm yelling in his regular voice, so you could tell him right away. This could easily be his smallest role though because he only has two lines. Robot Chicken airs right before this show, and since he did that one it's not too hard to see how he could do thos show, he could've even recorded it at the same time. His character is one that looks and acts like the character he played in Evilenko, but I wonder if he knew how brutal his character would be? While it's cool that he's involved in one of my favorite shows, he isn't given much to do with the character. Anything he might've said during the escape is pretty much blocked out by the music blasting and violence. His name sounds like a cannibalization of real life serial killers Albert Fish and Jeffrey Dahmer. His character is brought in with all the other worst of the worst to be killed for the concert and he is mad about it because he hates the band. He makes an escape by pounding one guard to death with a rock. So while he was still alive by the end of the show it is doubtful he will return as he seems more interested in eating children than wiping out Dethklok. Most voice actors do multiple roles on the show, so it is also possible he could show up again in a different role.
    The show has credibility because the music is real heavy and sounds good. This is because it is played by musicians from some of the heaviest bands. It's even better that the lyrics are so out there making it like a heavy metal version of Weird Al.
    You would only need a little background like the one I provided to get into the show as there aren't many recurring characters to keep track off. The animation is pretty low budget, nothing special, like a step below South Park, but it's not that important. The characters are like those in South Park in that they are all childish, but the kids probably know more than the band as they are pretty dopey. At first it seems like the episodes are too small, but with 20 a season it is equal to at least 10 twenty minute shows.
    It is a solid episode, not the best one they've ever done, but it has it's moments and is highlighted by the usually bloody violence which is done heavily in the prison break. One over the top scene which isn't funny is the generic president blowing half his face off to get Dethklok back. The funniest part is all the prisoners who are happily blown up and how their explosions make all kinds of metal related designs. The whole mace belt thing is silly until it unexpectedly causes the chaotic prison break. The guys are so happy to be back out playing that they don't seem to even notice or care that all those violent criminals got away. There is a good parody of the news with the excessive information ticker going on the bottom talking doom and gloom one minute and everything is fine the next. It's also fitting that one news report says it's the worst thing ever and then another says it's so great they are back. It's funny how they now start calling the manager a robot when he certainly acted like a typical businessman in a suit until the last episode when he showed he would stop at nothing to keep them save so he would still get his money even taking out a famous killer in hand to hand combat. Of course they are oblivious to all that. I also like how the loser fans died in the desert waiting for them to arrive including one moron holding his cellphone up to the sky waiting to take a picture. The whole show seems to be a send up of the cult of pop culture because all the news reporters and politicians rise and fall over what Dethklok does and no one seems to realize or maybe even car that they are just a bunch of dopes when they aren't on stage.

Rating: 8/10

Dethlessons

    They snuck Malcolm back in voicing another character who now sits on the council named Vata Orlag. He is essentially a replacement for the cardinal. There was no reason to bring back the character he played last time since he is content to just eat babies. So now I wonder how many episodes he will appear in since anything goes? This character could go the entire run of the season since they have a scene with the council each episode, Bremer could pop up and even a new character could be added since most actors do multiple roles on the show. This could be a lot of fun, hopefully they could have him play some dopey fan that dressed like Alex or some similar sort of parody. Malcolm's new character looks like a Viking with a huge bushy beard and some kind of hairy shoulder armor which is odd for a spiritualist, a warrior maybe. His small scene ends with the repeating of 'Clash of the Titans.' I was hoping this would lead to a parody scene of one of my favorite 80s films, but it went nowhere. It seems something was missing there. While it's great to having him as a recurring role in one of my favorite shows, I just wished he had something fun to do or say.
    The episode starts out like it's a music video and doesn't explain what was going on, maybe it was what Skwisgaar was thinking? At the end of last season Skwisgaar & Toki revealed they hate each other, now we learn Toki doesn't do anything. He was supposed to be the second fastest guitarist alive, now he's not good at anything. Murderface is my favorite character and he steals the show. He looks like a cross between The Golem from the 1920 German movie and Geezer Butler in the 70s era Black Sabbath. The whole episode revolves around him teaching Nathan and Pickles how to be a dick and is hilarious. It's funny how lame they are at following his lead and Skwis still buys it. This plot was good, the rest was weak.
    The whole thing with Toki was so weird because he is such a dope and wanted to be the best, but wasn't willing to put any effort into it at all. He's the second guitarist in the world's greatest band, but suddenly he was useless and couldn't even play anything during the recital. The crusty old guitar teacher was also weird and didn't add much, then died and said he loved him. There was nothing really funny about it. I was looking for some sort of Star Wars/Obi-Wan coming back from the dead to guide him bit, but it was just flat. The whole thing with them loving each other over nothing was also very unmetal.
    The ending with everyone apologizing out in public like that was also out of character for the world's most famous and brutal band. It would make them look like such wimps in public. The tabloids would all capture it on tape and make them look like jerks. Why would they care about someone who did nothing anyway?
    This is one of the weirdest and weakest episodes I've seen. There isn't much music or metal. Having Tony Iommi as the teacher or a lesser metal guitar legend would've added something more fitting with the show and would've made more sense why Skwis would be mad or jealous. Why would he care about some unknown gross old man anyway? So far this season isn't going as well as the first season, but I'm not going to stop watching now.

Rating: 5/10

Dethvengence

    Malcolm's character Vata is back and has twice as many lines as last time, but still says nothing funny. The result of what he explains is funny - basically Dethklok has been given free reign to do whatever they want with someone who pirates their music. This explains the great scene which happened right before about the kid caught downloading music illegally and then being tortured and kidnapped. So while it's great to have a show on with Malcolm every week with no idea what to expect, it's disappointing that his character isn't super evil or anything really special.
    Two characters believed to have been killed last season have returned - the nameless Assassin who dueled with Charles in the finale and Edgar the fat guy in the wheelchair who co-ran the biggest Dethklok website. The Assassin starts out torturing an unknown man trying to find a secret way into the Dethklok compound and in the end he has found his answer, but it means he'll have to enter the sewer pipes. It's a disgusting possibility, but I'm sure Charles has something up his sleeve for when the time comes. It's pitiful how Edgar wants to recreate his brother like Leatherface, but it was funny to see him swimming like a seal through the sewage since his legs don't work.
    The ironic punishment scene of torturing the kid by playing the music he wanted to steal at full volume was great which led to another good scene where the band arrogantly explains how they can hear the imperfections in the recording of their new song, but can't even recognize the voice of the guy next to him who is talking. It turns out they have severe hearing loss now and can't hear much at all. This explains why they have no reaction to the cheesy elevator music in their own compound. It's funny to hear something so wimpy when you'd expect the opposite. This leads to a scene which has potential, but falls flat. There's an Abbott & Costello scientist team which instead of getting into the crazy inventions they first show spend an agonizing time trying to explain their biggest invention in an exciting way like an infomercial. Instead of the band getting pissed, screaming, getting violent - anything, they stand there and say nothing and let it go on and on. As insane as it sounds to record on water it works with results better than anyone imagined. They don't go what into the cost would be do to this. They show a massive amount of energy is required to do it. It looks like it would cost a fortune and how are they going to bring it to the masses? It would've been a perfect gimmick for the Dethwater album, but the live mini piranhas in the CD was a fun gag.. It could've been a fun news report about all the water needed to make millions of Dethklok albums causing a world catastrophe. It is a funny idea especially instead of saying to burn it on CD they are saying to burn it on water. It gets even more silly when they say the water sounds better than real life. It all ends in a great way when they are all so stupid that they forget the water has music in it and they use it all up for the simplest tasks around the compound completely wasting all their time and money

Rating: 7/10

Dethdoubles

    Malcolm has one scene with two lines. After 3 episodes of doing the character it seems hopeless that he'll say anything cool. It's a very straightforward character that just sits there and is very serious. Hopefully we'll see him do something more than this soon. I wonder with Malcolm thinks of it, he couldn't possible get a show about a Death Metal band.
    Dethklok is still affiliated with Duncan Hills which goes right back to the first episode. The opening scene is really funny because the band admits hating everyone including themselves, each other and the fans. It's great how they show person after person and call each of them a douchebag. Once again a screw up by the band leads to a mass slaughter. It's so crazy that the roadies not only dress like, but are  executioners.
    This leads their manager to get them doubles so they won't screw up anymore, won't be bored at appearances and if they are killed it won't matter. The band is so stupid that they have no idea of the concept of doubles. They think they have to give them their faces or are clones or copies of them. So they totally go the wrong way and befriend them, instead taking them hostage or smothering them like they are caged hamsters never knowing they are fakes working for the enemy. Murderface has a great scene where he's insulting his double for being so ugly in every imaginable way, then admits he does look exactly like him. Then we get road trip photos of the guys taking the doubles everywhere. It would've been funny to see a bunch of clips of them acting all dopey together, but the main problem is there is no point of having doubles if you take them out in public, then everyone would know you had people pretending to be you. They missed this obvious fact in the show and writing the show.
    They act like schoolgirls watching and talking to the doubles on the phone and it's so funny because they are supposed to be so brutal, they really are a bunch of posers offstage. Once again they talk about giving it up so I wonder if the series is headed toward a breakup where they are on their own for a while. It could be pretty funny. There is also funny talk of just doing everything online instead of going outside.
    In the beginning of the series they played the coffee jingle on the Arctic Circle, now it's on a volcano. Of course there is more slaughter, but this time it wasn't their fault and was planned. Turning a volcano into the world's biggest coffee pot was great with them even pouring in huge vats of cream. For some reason Charles never finds out what the doubles were up to. He's slipping as he usually catches these things. At the end the band is such dopes that they are willing to burn themselves to look like the disfigured doubles. They get over it quick enough when they have the opportunity to kill them which is more brutal than apologizing. This was a really good episode with lots of funny stuff.

Rating: 8.5/10

Bloodrocuted Music Video

    Malcolm's character appears in 2 quick scenes, but has no dialog and doesn't do anything. The song is also very short, only around half as long as a normal video. Also the video is nothing like what the song is supposed to be about, a man who uses his blood as a power conductor at an energy plant to kill people. While the show is about the band, this video is about some unknown kid and the band is just in the background which is disappointing. It doesn't have the crazy fun quality of the show, even when they have music video segments in the show as those feature the band. It could've used the council in the beginning explaining what the artifact was and what it could do. That would've made it flow easier to match the show. Basically it just doesn't feel like the usual Metalocalypse and with no indication of what anything means that we are seeing it's not as fun. The band has no lines, nothing is done outside the music, so there is none of the fun their dopiness provides. As a stand alone piece it's OK, but as part of the show canon is doesn't work. It's also a different look at the council with Vata in the middle and Mr. Salacia right behind them with a bunch of unknown characters filling out the space on either side.

Rating: 6/10

Dethfashion

    This episode is a turning point in Malcolm's career because for the first time he voices three different characters in one episode. He tops when he did 2 on Robot Chicken only a month earlier. Also this makes the fourth voice for the season. Like on RC he is a reporter and for the first time since the first episode he got to have some fun by voicing Eric from the movie clip where he just says crazy stuff in a German accent. Vata at least had a cool quotable line this time about fashion designers, "They dance on the brink of madness."
    The opening seems like any other concert until we see there are caged animals around them for no reason and it pulls back to reveal it's actually a fashion show. Of course with this show it's not like any other fashion show as it's all metal and leather, that's actually metal, not just a style. Like usual things go horribly wrong and people start dying violently. This is why the animals were really there, to unleash carnage when things went haywire. As usual the band doesn't get hurt or seem to care. Instead they go the opposite route holding a press conference not to apologize, but that they want to get into fashion and this sends up red flags to the Council. There is no explanation as to how or why they knew about Eric as that is all out of their league, possibly because he had a reputation for being so brutal and was a criminal. Interestingly he was convicted for starving models to death, but now he's into a completely new crime, skinning people alive for the materials to make his leather designs. There's no indication on how or why Dethklok was able to get Eric paroled either. How are they so close to the German government? I would think the incident with the troll would make them unpopular with governments in that area of Europe.
    Murderface starts by saying he's not gay at the fashion show, which leads to a pattern with him the whole episode. One of the best scenes is an endless diatribe he gives about not eating anything shaped like a penis - hot dogs, sausages, etc. The other guys not only don't get it, but question his obsession with talking about it. Of course in their typical dopey fashion they bring up crazy examples that even Murderface can see makes no sense. No one brought up the fact of him doing solos in concert with his penis in front of many men being rather gay, which would've been great.
    Another good scene is how they can't fit into their new outfits. Not only are the outfits goofy throwbacks to 80s metal acts like Manowar, they also mock on how fake and buff those kinds of bands look on their album covers. They are all shirtless and airbrushed when in real life they are all fat. The album picture also looked like Manowar or something from Kiss, which is great when they goof on those bands instead of just the death metal circuit. What really doesn't add up is the clothes are too tight, but they don't take them off and wear them outside to the grocery store. They've shopped there before with little trouble which makes me wonder how the world's most popular band can just go to the store and not be bothered or mobbed by legions of fans. Is the store on their compound or something? The whole segment about them not wanting to exercise and train is great, even better is their brain dead idea to lose weight by just eating one huge meal before bed and having Popsicle sticks for snacks is classic. It's such a great mock on celebrity culture. It doesn't matter how rich and famous they are, underneath it all they are a bunch of idiots who just think they know it all. Once again they don't see how stupid their plan is and a doctor has to explain it. Of course Murderface is the most disgusting, he's so hungry that he's eating his own puke. Thankfully, that's one visual they spared us from.
    The end is great because they all go sulk and hide in a closet to eat. I mean, it's their house so who are they hiding from!? They all know they are doing it, and why are they all in the dark? So no one can see what they are doing, including themselves? Funny stuff. They all know they are getting fat and so does their manager, so it's just even funnier they would go through all the cloak and dagger to only hide from themselves and fail at it. At the end Murderface is caught eating a huge sausage, maybe he is trying too hard to hide that he's gay?
    The ending with the skin wasn't really a surprise, but it was a surprise that the band freaked out about it. They think and act like they are so brutal, but this is somehow too far for them. This is the best episode of the season so far with giving Malcolm so much to do and all the great pop culture parodying of stupid celebrity fixations.

Rating: 9/10

Cleanzo

    This one was disappointing because Malcolm is back down to voicing one character and he only had 1 line. Oh, well. This episode was mostly about Dr. Rockzo where they give him the Snakes N Barrels treatment of showing his history. Rockzo is a funny character because he's a mock of most of the goofy hair metal lead singers of the 80s mixed with the moves of David Lee Roth. In the end he's still an original character as no singers like that dressed like clowns, let alone a whole band. For some reason Murderface appears in the documentary, but screws himself with the band by listing himself as lead songwriter. The more they reveal about the musical prowess of the band, the less sense it makes on how big they are. No one can read music, Murderface and Toki really don't do anything, Nathan writes the lyrics, so that only leaves Skwisgaar and Pickles to do the music writing. If Skwisgaar can't read music and Pickles is a major drunk and drug addict, how does anything get done musically? By going for so much humor on how stupid the band is they ignore the fact about their music being so popular. They wrote the Dethwater album themselves locked in a submarine and we've never seen any song writers brought in. Why were they all there if some of them do nothing? It seemed like Nathan was in charge as he kept erasing everything.
    It's fun to see Murderface caught and give his dumb excuses about he could've done it even though he didn't. He even tries to write on an acoustic guitar and sing on his own which was a total disaster. His lyrics were goofy, funny and ended in disaster both times. Even goofier was Nathan didn't understand what the sound of an acoustic guitar was. Toki is even more useless than usual as he can't even drive. It's funny how much Charles hates Rockzo. He had the crew beat him the last time he was at the compound and this time has them torture him with electricity. The best scene was Nathan reading his paper that is supposed to be helpful to Rockzo, but is just about how much he hates him. I didn't get the significance of the therapist with robot arms though. He wasn't human or was it another Darth Vader reference? The Rockzo music video was OK, but the whole rehab experience was not shown in any way and could've been filled with fun stuff. At the end it's funny to see Rockzo without makeup as he's a haggard looking old man. When his nose falls off it wasn't clear what that meant. Was it like Pinocchio? Instead of growing it fell off or did it fall off from all the drug use or was it some kind of Michael Jackson surgery disaster?
    This was an OK episode, it just didn't have much going on when there could've been a bunch of quick scenes of funny stuff with Rockzo going through hell in rehab. What sucks even more is the show doing 3 episodes, then a month off, 3 episodes and now at least 5 weeks off. Watching TV today just sucks so bad, there's no consistency with anything. Everything has to be dragged out as long as possible.

Rating: 6/10

Dethwedding

    Only 6 episodes, then 6 months off when the episodes were ready to air is such shit programming. What is the point? It only makes the show harder to find and easy to forget about. People lose interest when they do things like that. What happened to the good old days when you got a new episode of a show every week from September to May?
    The episode opens cryptically with some unknown terrorist group attacking someone previously unknown - the head of Dethklok Australia. There's no explanation about what any of that means. Is that their fan club? What do they do for the band down there and why? By the end it seems like Seth, the replacement is actually ruling the country.
    We are introduced to a new character Seth, who is pickles screw up brother. We get a picture of what Pickles would be like if he wasn't in the band. For the first time we see the counsel isn't interested in getting involved foreshadowing what the band has in mind. We also get an indication of where the band lives as the map shows their train coming in to Wisconsin from the west, it would seem they live in the area of the Rocky Mountains.
    Surprisingly the band is gung ho about going to the wedding, not because they care about it, but because families and weddings are brutal and hate filled. They just want to see Pickles suffer. It gets funny when they arrive and Pickles parents are all impressed with Seth's place, which is really nothing and is above their garage. At one point Seth seems to hypnotize Pickles about money, but it doesn't go any farther. The bachelor party is great because the women are so gross including one with a bandaid on her ass. The guys know this, but they don't even care.
    At the wedding Seth gives a really hate filled speech and it's odd because no one cares. One of the best parts is when Pickles tries to run away and the guys won't let him and beat him up. Amazingly the guys stand up to the annoying and stupid relatives without a care. They just ignore them waiting for Pickles to explode. Seth seems to have invited them figuring they'd give him an expensive gift, so when he only gets a blender he loses it. There is no indication that the band got him something cheap to set him off, but if they did it worked. It's also very funny to hear Murderface and Nathan wax philosophical about seeing Pickles brutally beat up his brother.
    In the end Pickles feels bad about what he did and wants to get Seth a job like Seth made up that he was getting. Everyone is smart enough to know that is a bad idea, but Charles has a way to get rid of him. Somehow Seth is able to persevere in this mystery job and seeming take of the country, the only problem is when he does it's completely in flames. There's no indication what that means and we'll probably never see him again. Is this terrorist group out to wipe of Dethklok or is it just a powergrab in Australia?
    This episode is better than the last one with all the twisted marriage jokes. Malcolm only plays 1 role this time and only has two lines. His character is also against marriage, so maybe he has a miserable life away from the counsel.

Rating: 8/10

PR Klok

    It's weird they did back to back Pickles episodes, maybe this is starting a trend? It's a funny opening to have some drunk fool on who doesn't know what he's doing when the contestant is playing for his life. If there was a show in real life like it people would probably be stupid enough to put their lives in the hands of a favorite celebrity. I'm not sure how the guy was cut to death by cash though, was it made of razor sharp metal? It's funny how none of the band knew the answer was Pluto
    Once again Malcolm only voices Vata, no secondary fun to be had. The counsel reveals that Liz is a fake, a Hale Bop style cult leader who never dies with her cult and has been playing her game for almost 40 years. It's great how the band doesn't even realize that Charles could do these things for them if they wanted, but they think it has to be a woman. He warns them about too much lame exposure, but they don't get that either, they are just like jealous little kids. I was waiting for Pickles to challenge another metal drummer to a fight to make him really seem like Axl Rose, but they didn't go that route. Being a huge fan of classic video games I loved that Toki was playing a Battlezone style game. It wasn't the exact game, but was close enough to be. These super rich guys could have anything, but they go with the classics. It's great how Toki wants to be involved and the other guys don't want him. Instead of really promoting themselves, they start a PR firm to promote the firm which is stupid, useless fun.
    I like the Regis & Kelly mock on how they would have anyone hot on their show, even if there is no way that person fits their format. Murderface starts to take over the PR firm and none of his plans make any sense, but the other guys agree with him. His brilliant logic is they have to go on something other than TV, but won't say what that is, since there isn't anything else. They've already failed at the movies and the only other thing is the Internet which they should try. They continue to go about everything wrong and learn quick that if they go to promote something in public they will be bothered, so instead they go to the farthest reaches of the earth and even space to promote nothing to no one. After they are done Charles reveals they spent millions on nothing and are all bummed about it and don't understand why they aren't more famous.
    Then just like when they were watching the Snakes N' Barrels behind the music show Pickles walks in and they forget they know him. Like celebrity obsessed losers they are all in awe of him from seeing him all over TV and magazines and jump at the chance to do a gig with him in the middle of nowhere. After they realize that they did know him after all. It seems that Pickles isn't even making any money when they show him meeting with Liz, she just gives him calendars and coupons which makes him even more dumb. Then in a quick James Bond moment she reveals her plans to us via her computer. It doesn't explain why she chose Pickles, probably because he's a moron, but anyone in the band would've done. How was she able to approach him in the first place? Nathan admits a great truth that he can sing whatever he wants since no one understands his lyrics anyway. He should be careful, that means he could be easily replaced.
    There was no reason for torturing people since they were supposed to die when the comet crashed into them. The whole plan was actually majorly flawed because if a comet the magnitude of the one that was supposed to hit really did it would've killed everyone in the area and maybe millions the world over. She should've known better and used her money to build some kind of underground shelter so she could survive. This was a good episode, but nothing special and has been done before with them playing some out of the way concert that leads to major carnage, the only twist was this time they unknowingly saved the world.

Rating: 7/10

Dethcarrado

    I never would've believed a short cartoon about a dumb metal band would parody Werner Herzog's Fitzcarraldo, even if they didn't spell it right, probably because they are so dumb. I wonder how many people would even know that's what they were going for, especially the younger audience?
    For the first time in this new set of episodes Malcolm plays a second role. This one starts the show off as the explorer documenting the natives. It's a little bit like A Clockwork Orange where Alex likes the Bible for the dirty stories, here Pickles likes the documentary because it mentions a new drug he hasn't taken. Nathan is the only one really into the show. The DVR guitar pedal rewind and fast forward was a clever joke here. The weird thing is when the host plays the natives Dethklok music the joke doesn't go anywhere. The band doesn't seem to notice or care and the natives don't have much reaction.
    It's ironic and just doesn't fit with the band's stupidity that for some reason they have a massive library seemingly worthy of any museum. Maybe it came with the house? But they do use it on occasion. This starts a subplot about how bad Murderface's breath smells throughout the episode. He seems like he's always hygienically challenged, so what took them so long to notice? Another subplot starts where Skwisgaar accuses Toki of copying everything he does and Toki's response is to also accusing him of copying. It's funny to hear them go back and forth over and over. We then learn why Nathan was so interested in the TV special, his grandmother had traveled to the same area and possibly mated with the natives, they aren't clear about it, but it's hinted strongly. He feels they are related and wants to go. Pickles gets off a good metal themed joke as well as a nod to the singer of the band who does voices on the show.
    Somehow the council knows instantly where Dethklok is going. Is there a spy in the organization? They don't say either way how they know so fast. This is the first time we see Malcolm's main character from out behind the desk, though it's in a long shot. He's wearing a long robe instead of military style dress. We also see that he has now become the most powerful member of the council under Salacia as they have plotted behind Crozier's back and want him to know he needs watching. Maybe this has something to do with previous failures and the Cardinal's death or is a suicide mission.
    The scene in the outfitters store is great because everyone has something funny going on. Skwisgaar & Toki turn to arguing again, Murderface now smells and talks with his mouth full, Pickles thinks snakes are worms and Nathan tells Charles off. Pickles remark is even more idiotic since he was in a band with snakes in the title and should know better.
    On the way down Murderface learns something gross about parasites and tries to warn the band, but doesn't heed his own advice and soon gets them. Dethklok's crew is even better equipped and smarter than Crozier's as they are caught and shot down. Then a long joke begins with the roadies blasting a huge area of the forest killing everything so they can land, then they don't even use it. I suppose their planes landed their to pick up the band later, but it wasn't shown.
    It seems Murderface is called that because he's so ugly. Well, seems everything else about him is ugly too as the band is repulsed by his body, penis, ass and behavior as well. This is where the parody truly becomes obvious, when they pull the Dethboat over the mountain, which is main scene from Fitzcarraldo, except here it goes horribly wrong. The boat flies over the other side killing the roadies and the band stays on board for the scary ride that ends in a crash. Even worse, there's no water there, so the boat is finished. Going down the Amazon and this scene pretty much end that parody. It seems their lives are spared because they match the carvings on the mountain, but it isn't explored. Maybe it was from the explorer playing their music for them that they carved it.
    The episode ends in chaos with the drugs, the music performance and the discovery of Crozier's men. It's unclear what happens to the general, it's possible he's killed, cooked, eaten or all of the above. We'll have to see if he escapes in the next episode. It happens fast, but everyone in the band has a real animal spirit, except for Toki who has some sort of rabbit satyr or something wimpy like that. It's funny and bizarre looking and seems to have his head as well. This is the best episode of part 2 of season 2 so far, very well done and an intelligent subject to parody that probably has never been done before.

Rating: 9/10

Dethgov

    The intro didn't work at all except as a long set up to the joke at the end. How and why would Nathan be elected class president when he was such an idiot and an outcast? He has no interest in politics later in life, has no idea how it works and doesn't even reference the second grade, so he obviously learned nothing. The name of the governor is a funny parody of 2 late 80s hair band singer - Kip Winger & Mark Slaughter so it's appropriate death metal fans would want to rip them apart.. Once again no reason is given why Dethklok fans in Florida suddenly want a Nathan holiday. It makes less sense when Nathan says he'd have to live there to be governor. I guess with the same redneck driver in the beginning and the end they are alluding Nathan grew up there, but it isn't spelled out.
    Malcolm is back in his secondary recurring role as the Channel 57 reporter. This time we even get to hear him commenting on the action without seeing him. It's funny to hear him saying crazy lines like "Pieces of his flesh are being torn away and the name Dildo is written on his forehead." I always wonder what he thinks when he's reading that stuff. We learn the president has a direct line to Charles as he calls him right in the middle of the chaos to make a plea. It's also funny how the band is so oblivious and callous about what goes on around them and because of them. They are more concerned about sweating during an outdoor concert than murder and mayhem. Nathan always sucks at speeches and gives one of his best, worst speeches completely forgetting why he was there and what he was supposed to say.
    For the first time the council has a humorous scene with the unexplained meaning behind the purple alert. It only consists of a very loud, annoying siren and the members don't know what to do about it. We also learn Crozier escaped from the Amazon looking unscathed. The band totally hates the idea of politics until they learn they can have unlimited power. Only Toki wants to do good, but he too becomes corrupted when he has his own assistant he can order around.
    There's no surprise when everything in the state takes a metal look. There is heavy use of magazines and newspaper headlines to describe the action which means jokes can be easily missed. The scenes of Skwisgaar heavy sex with really old ladies is disturbing and shows how screwed up he is since that is the only way he can get off. It's great how there is no fantasy solutions and in reality everything Nathan does completely screws things up. At first it makes no sense that he's printing up money since he would have no control over the federal reserve. The joke pays off when they show he created his own currency just for Florida that is deemed worthless. A fast montage makes it hard to catch all the jokes about how bad things are getting. It's like in Germany before World War II where it would take wheel barrows full of cash to buy the simplest things. There's no reason alligator attacks should be on the rise, but it's still a funny part of the escalating turmoil.
    Somehow without police no one in the band is marked for death by the people or assaulted, maybe they are having too good a timing rioting and looting. Where are their roadies to protect them either? I enjoy the sounds of Murderface just screaming random madness over the radio. They play a concert to raise money, but can't even catch a break with nature as a hurricane comes in when they play. Or are they saying the band conjured the hurricane? The band goes to the weather center seemingly without realizing it. The whole surreal scene is a great mock on how weather people don't really do much and we have no power over nature in any way at all when it comes to weather. It's wrong when Nathan is told he can name the hurricane as hurricanes are given names long before they even exist, so there's no way he could name it right before it hits. That's purely ridiculous, but it's just a setup for Nathan to pick a crazy name for it. When it hits somehow it becomes the most powerful hurricane of all-time, even worse than a tornado since it literally rips people apart.
    Nathan's term is either up, he's been recalled, he's stepping down or is being forced out. Nothing is said either way, he just leaves, though it seems only a few people are left alive in the state. The ending doesn't make sense that the redneck from the intro survived a bullet to the head only with an eyepatch and somehow cops are chasing him when we were told a couple of times the police fled the state. A statue of Nathan still stands, there is no Saddam style toppling of it shown.
    This was a good episode, but the corruption of power is a standard plot line and the whole beginning and ending seem tacked on and didn't work. Still it was good to have Malcolm back in 2 roles once again.

Rating: 7/10

Dethrace

    Malcolm was listed in the credits, but this is the first episode of the season he didn't appear in. No one on the council got to speak, only the Murderface expert. I can't imagine anyone into NASCAR would want to see a man play bass with his penis, but there were no reports that anyone got upset. With the preemption, everyone missed it. There's a little not to the awful sounding band Goatwhore, then a great mock of the celebrity culture that gets away with everything on the roads. Skwisgaar is driving drunk without a license and Toki is firing a gun at the cops, but since they are famous they get away with just a light sentence. Most shocking is the ken doll entertainment reporter survived the comet crash AND is still allowed on TV though he now looks like Freddy Kreuger. 
    The band has seem to split lately with Nathan and Pickles hanging out Skwisgaar & Toki on the other side, though they don't seem to like each other and Murderface on his own. No one cares about him or his feelings which is funny as is it to hear him beat himself up. Toki gets hit by a car in this one, but has no injuries which is hard to believe.
    Murderface comes up with an idea that no one understands or cares about. It's great when Pickles says he'll help explain it, but offers nothing. The best part is when the Murderface expert speaks. He goes on and on listing everything wrong with him and it's endless, everything about his looks, appearance, personality and behavior is ridiculed. He's basically a complete disaster. It's like a routine out of Monty Python or Family Guy. This goes to another funny scene in driving school when they are shown a parody of the old Ohio State Police films like Blood on the Highway, except their title is much crazier. It's also great how these guys in the most brutal band who think they are so tough are totally freaked out by this. Then there's another good scene when Charles confronts Murderface about the event and he doesn't pay any attention to him and just parrots what he says. 
    Skwisgaar & Toki turn to complete losers when they can't drive at all because the film scared them so much. Pickles drugs Murderface and he turns into a basketcase for his first press conference. Nathan is great when he goes from concerned to not caring pretty fast when he opts to mess with him instead of helping him. The event is more spectacle than any kind of actual race and just turns into mayhem like most Dethklok events do with Murderface out of it and Skwisgaar & Toki not knowing how to drive and crashing. 
    Even without Malcolm this was a funny episode. This season is really going well.

Rating: 8.5/10

The Revengencers

    Malcolm is back this week, so he's not gone, I guess they just didn't have anything for him to do last week. He doesn't have much to do here either, just catching us up with characters we haven't seen in a while, but it doesn't make sense that he wouldn't know about the assassin. Just because he came before he was a counsel member, he could've easily read up on him. The opening is another mock on Guns N' Roses with the skull mugs that look just like the hairy skulls on their Appetite for Destruction album. Mocking on the teenage fans for having their parents credit cards to the coffee shop and hot topic is a great attack on mall culture. Then we have the obese fan who thinks he's better than other fans because of his story about going to an old show. When the store blows up with them inside it's very appropriate, a cleaning out of the gene pool. A very good opening all around.
    Then we get one of those lame press conferences that are total lies. A string of bomb explosions is just said to be random gas explosions, something that no one with any intelligence would believe. The counsel reveals the surviving Jomfru brother and the Assassin are the terrorists behind the plot. They were mentioned in Dethwedding, but never shown. Edgar has descended into madness even more by having a kid wear a mask of his dead brothers' face to keep him around.
    Charles is trying to repair their image and the band doesn't even understand why. As usual it's not their fault and they don't care. It turns out Nathan has a cold and all the guys can relate to that. Soon they all decide they are sick too. This turns into a great scene in the doctor's office where they all go in thinking that they are going to die. They want to do anything to cure it and the doctore mocks on them and calls them idiots since it's just a cold. It doesn't take long for them to go against his orders when they want to drink. Murderface comes up with a crazy solution and they all agree with it. Then he comes up with a worse one and they don't question it either. Instead of saying your last stupid idea didn't work, they decide to do it probably because it's more brutal. Charles has one of the best lines when they are getting blood transfusions and he asks if they are ready for the concert. Surprisingly they don't try to get out of it, then decide to do only one song. They try to meet with the fans who are too hurt to respond and it goes bad. It gets worse when Nathan tells them he's sick so the concert won't be good. Not to mention the fact people with weakened immune systems wouldn't want to get Nathan's cold.
    I liked how Nathan still doesn't remember Toki's name. No one is more shocked than Edgar when Dethklok's fans turn on him. He thought they would be as bitter as he was because they got blown up, but they are still loyal to the band and save their lives without them knowing. Charles once again shows how powerful he is by fighting off the assassin. There has to be some backstory brewing about him and how he got that way. It's classic carnage when the Dethklok roadies wind up killing every fan in sight while trying to get the assassin on the way out.
    It was a good episode, just not for Malcolm's character since it made him seem uninformed. I was waiting for Crozier to jump on him especially after Vata sent him to the Amazon, but he said nothing. Now that we know who the terrorists are and what they are planning it seems obvious what they are going for in the season finale, a showdown leading to the end of Edgar and the assassin.

Rating: 7.5/10

Klokblocked

    Malcolm only has one line in this one, so it's another quick appearance. I love when they mock the idiotic TV entertainment shows and it's hilarious to think a woman in a coma is somehow able to cheat on someone. How is she out meeting and dating people? There is also a great shot of Nathan taking her to some fancy event with her still unconscious and people are taking their pictures. They even come up with one of those stupid celebrity combo names Waltbecca. Did they call them Natebecca before?
    For some reason the guys aren't able to get girls on their own so they leach off Nathan, but then this is contradicted in the bar when two girls try to hook up with Skwisgaar. Murderface tries to pretend to be sensitive to score with women, but no one is buying it, not even strangers. For some reason Nathan puts up an ad on a dating page. He could just have roadies or Charles hook him up. The page has some crazy details like listing him as a Caucasian Native American. How can that be a real combo? I thought he was related to the Amazonian tribe.  This ad causes chaos amongst women, but none are seeing coming to Mordhaus or anything like that. It makes no sense for them to be rioting in the streets. He brings home a bunch of women, but none of them are metal or brutal looking, they all look pretty straight. For some reason him being single unleashes the Succuboso Explosion. Where have they been all along? They could've gotten to Nathan anytime, was does him being single matter? The counsel seems to think they will kill Nathan and do nothing to stop them.
    The guys are overly nice to Rachel and it makes Nathan crazy. They have an answer for everything he suggests. It turns out she plays Scrabble with them and Nathan just watches fuming. It's funny that they can just overpower him by being overbearingly nice to his girl. Even worse they like the girl so much and Nathan isn't even into her. This leads to a fun scene where two girls in a bar rip into Murderface since he's just the bass player and doesn't count. They really trash bass players in general and Murderface is totally shell shocked by this.
    Nathan has a new girl the next day and the guys can't deal with it since they've bonded so much with the old girl. They've completely done it behind his back that they are hanging out with her without Nathan and he's enraged. It would be funnier if they had planned to make Nathan go crazy, but instead they are just such dopes. They even have all the girls together and it seems like they are trying to be nice to them in order for the girls to want to be with them, but it doesn't seem to be working out for them past a friendship stage. Probably because women aren't turned on by guys who are so needy. Nathan totally loses it again and Murderface is great trying to suck up to Nathan like he is on his side.
    The ending is a complete surprise because Murderface totally risks himself to save Nathan. Not only that, he succeeds. This leads to a great double entendre line. Before the guys were cockblocking him figuratively and now it was literal and it saved his life. This was another good episode even if it's a bit silly that these ultrafamous guys are having trouble getting women.

Rating: 7.5/10

Dethsources

    There was no continuation from last week. I was expecting to see Murderface milking his new found "hero" status. Maybe Nathan would be extra nice to him and Murderface would let it go to his head. Instead we get a different confrontation and once again Malcolm has only one line. It's funny that their roadies have a name parodying the Mouskateers, what could be more of a contrast than Dethklok? The only problem is we don't know what they have to go through. It's some kind of boot camp, but they completely gloss over any details just showing them arriving and some at the end getting branded. It's the first time they are called Klokateers and all we are really told is that there is a fight to the death, so half of them will die.
    This goes into a great scene were we learn if they guys want any money they have to ask Charles for it and he can turn them down. Then for the first time we learn they might not have as much money as they used to, but he doesn't say they are going broke or anything. In classic fashion the band are totally pissed off and seem to think he's cheating them, but then completely forget all about it when Nathan starts texting something stupid to Toki. This doesn't make sense because Nathan can't even remember Toki's name and doesn't seem to like him at all, but the scene turns totally crazy and really funny when it happens.
    Last episode we saw Nathan hitting golf balls and now all the guys are doing it, but wearing super dorky old men's golfing outfits. They are so not metal. Nathan reveals what a dope he is thinking to buy new socks he needs $10,000. The real question is if they have no money, how do they hire the new guy? And how does he get on the cover of a magazine with the band so fast?
    There's a great scene they don't do enough with the band explaining what is metal. This time it's to the health inspector who is distressed with the conditions down below, but once they assure him it's totally metal, he's fine with it. Then we see Melmort isn't going to teach them anything, instead he is going to sponge off them. There are a couple of shots with Skwisgaar and really old ladies again, this time double teaming them with Melmort. They need to explain the sick fascination more. The band doesn't know they can fire Charles, but Melmort has it figured out. Before they can decide if they want to fire him they are distracted by another stupid texting joke, this time Toki returns the favor and Nathan can't figure out where it came from.
    Charles seems to know what Melmort is up to and warns him he won't leave unless he's dead. When Melmort is loading the papers into his briefcase it requires signatures and Pickles full name is listed as 'Pickles the Drummer'. Looks like he has no last name or had it legally changed which is funny. The whole thing ends in a concert mixed with a duel to the death and Charles again shows his superiority in combat. I wonder if the guys will even notice Melmort is missing.
    I think they missed the brutality boat by not showing some of the violence the roadies go through. Besides the fact that it would make the roadies more important if we saw what they went through. In previous episodes they seem to have little skill in shooting things as they miss their targets often and cause mayhem. Otherwise it was good and the stuff with the testing was really funny.

Rating: 7/10

Dethdad

    This is the second episode without Malcolm, though his character Vata was there and did make eyes to Crozier. The opening has Murderface turned into Homer Simpson with the guys tricking him into doing the same thing over and over again so they can torture him. Murderface never catches on and doesn't attack them or anything. It starts a running joke with the firecrackers that goes throughout the episode and it's great stuff.
    The second scene starts out weird with Skwisgaar making stupid comments about Toki's dad and then turns into something surreal and absolutely hilarious. Toki is too stunned to talk so Skwisgaar moves his lips and talks for him. He winds up going into a deep psychological discussion with himself where he doesn't want to go and makes himself at Toki for doing it. It's one of the funniest moments in the whole series.
    When Toki says he's going back to Norway as expected the guys don't care and blow him off saying they have to make the new album. Charles hears this and starts pushing them on it, but they have no interest in working. Before Toki can leave they decide they'd rather go with him than have to work. The counsel has a meeting about Toki's dad dying. For the first time an expert is brought in that the panel thinks is a joke. In the end it turns out he is completely wrong.
    Nathan reveals he only wanted to go to have fun at the birthplace of deathmetal and has no sympathy for Toki even when he reveals that he's close to his dad and it would suck if he died. Murderface reveals his parents died in a murder/suicide which would explain why he's so messed up. When they blow up his hand he's incredulous since that's his bass playing hand and they mock him since it doesn't matter. In Norway Toki isn't eager to go see his dad so he agrees to go do something else. When they go to the first deathmetal store it's once again out of The Simpsons with the Comic Book Guy equivalent of Norwegian deathmetal. He's just a complete self righteous jerk and the stuff he plays is more a cacophony of noise than music and of course he thinks Dethklok is too digital and won't stock them. They get bored fast and want to see Toki's dad die, but when they get there, no one wants to go in, so they aren't as brutal as they claim.
    When Toki sings the kids song in his quest to find himself it's the last amusing part of the show. The rest just isn't funny as it is a bad attempt at sick, black humor and really has no pay off. This makes it the weakest episode so far. You could just watch the three funny scenes and pass on all the rest and it would be much better and more fun.

Rating: 6/10

Snakes and Barrels II

    It's too bad the first double episode has almost no Malcolm. Vata has only two short lines in the whole show. He has almost as many lines as the preview of next week's episode. Once again they are mocking on old hair metal bands like Guns N Roses. Last time they had a special about the band and now they are back of course there is another cash in with yet another TV special. They just added another now - where are they now now? This is a funny parody of the genre by just making the name even sillier with two nows. The new singer's name sounds like a combination of Rikki Rachtman and the band Kix, it's the perfect stupid name. When it is revealed they got back together clean because Pickles was the problem he flips.
    Pickles turns into a Sebastian Bach type, even though Snakes was around before he got there, he thinks he is the band. The band goes on with out him and he's in the biggest band now and he still gets jealous. He starts breaking lamps which is funny because it's so weak. He could be breaking massive things around there like a real rockstar. The best part is then Murderface gets jealous and paranoid someone will steal the name of his side project, even though he hasn't ever done anything with it. He says he has the name registered, but we soon learn he doesn't. Then everyone wants to be either breaking lamps or in on the meeting or both. It deteriorates into a dumb joke that Pickles wants to know where Snakes are now, but the guys think he's talking about the show they just watched and they keep telling him it's on the TV. It's still funny since no one gets it.
    The council learns there is a side effect to the drugs they gave Snakes and Barrels last time, but there is no indication of anything bad happening if it does. We get to see a straight Rockso without his clown makeup and it's not a pretty sight. He's like an old washed up rock star from decades ago.
    It turns out the guys know that Murderface doesn't have the Planet Piss name registered for a website so Toki steals it and all the domain names possible. No surprise to learn that Rikki is a total fraud. He has gotten in so much trouble from alcohol he wants everyone to be as miserable as he is by being sober. What is surprising is the band has never been to Los Angeles before. Surely they would've toured somewhere nearby? Pickles gives them the tour of the glam rock scene which mirrors real life back then and gets even sicker. He seems to think that all this is because of drugs and if they get rid of drugs from music it'll be all over.
    When they sneak into the show it's like right out of the Three Stooges, they are all wearing the same lame mustache disguise, but it works. When one guy is kicked out for having drugs, this sets a chain reaction of chaos later. Rockso starts to lose it in classic drug addict fashion. He starts going through withdrawal and hearing voices, this time it is the clown, like he was saying before, trying to get him back on drugs. He's making this speech and talking to the clown and the crowd wonders what is going on because he's losing it and not introducing the band. This leads to 4 separate stories with the band. Nathan and Skwisgaar want to get wasted never remembering that it is a sober concert. They try to get beer and the vendors are a bunch of dorks that try to sell them lame stuff like water and apples. At the same time the typical screaming loser fan gets in Toki's face and he starts to lose it. Also Pickles is working his way backstage by bribes. He yells at them and they don't really care. Before he can get anywhere with them he's thrown out. Nathan starts smacking the vendors around and Rockso finds the confiscated cocaine. Murderface meanwhile went to change his shorts so he wouldn't look like he peed in his pants and learns that Toki stole his names and put all kinds of pictures of Murderface naked with animals on them and left a note that Toki owns it. He flips out and wants to kill Toki. It's so funny that he had it yanked out from under him and he embarrassed him with those pictures.
    Then everything turns into a bloodbath and insanity. Pickles is beating Rikki, Rockso is raping a woman, Toki is beating the yelling guy and the crowd is hit with side effect the council was warning about. I don't know what the warning was about because it seemed like some crazy LSD trip and no one seemed to be greatly affected, there was no mass murder like at other shows. Rockso the RNR Clown is back, so we could be seeing him again soon.
    It was a good episode. Since I lived through the whole glam metal era it's great when they mock that whole scene especially Axl Rose who looks like Pickles when he had the huge hair back then and the cornrows now. Everyone had their own stories making it an epic show which it should've been because of the double length. It's just a shame that Malcolm didn't get twice as much to do.

Rating: 9/10

Dethrecord

    This episode opens with Malcolm looking like the CH57 reporter he usually voices, but now he's a C&N reporter which is a funny little parody of CNN. It even has the news overload ticker on the bottom with Dethklok info. No word on where the nuclear device came from, who has it and where it would be detonated. The vandalized Mt. Rushmore is funny, but the monument is massive and spray paint wouldn't do anything, it would take untold buckets of paint to do that.
    In the studio it's funny how everyone does their own thing and no one cares about each other. They give Pickles a hard time and lie to him about food to make him mad. Suddenly Skwisgaar can't touch his own guitar without making it buzz unless he jumps in the air. The only solution they can come up is having him jump from a helicopter so he freefalls long enough to record all his parts. It's funny, but it wasn't a problem when they recorded the Underwater Album. Plus how has he written all these parts when no one else has written much of anything? It's great that Toki screws it all up in his usual stupid way and he has to do it again. The two dopiest guys suddenly team up - Murderface and Toki. They decide to write a song on their own about taking it easy. Nathan wants to be the most metal and decides the best way is to sing in a suit of armor, which makes too many clanking sounds in the recording booth.
    The highlight of the episode is the music video for Murderface and Toki's song. It wasn't enough for them to just record it, but they made a goofy video to go with it. They want the band to relax and offer them hot towels. The song is really weak and lame and the video is totally cheesy, like something Rockso would do. Plus it's bizarre that it's supposed to be about relaxing when everything they do in it causes a major disaster. For some reason Charles wants the rest to humor them about their song and they do, until they think this means it will go on the album. It's funny when they say it's not good and Murderface flips out and decides he'll take it for himself. Then he calls Toki greedy for thinking he's in his side band while he's the greedy one who wants to steal it. Toki turns on him and Murderface says it isn't a good idea to throw the towels on him which is great because he's suddenly not so tough.
    The band goes to recording, then the whole scene turns into a big mock of the way the Vatican selects a new pope with tons of people gathering around to watch the chimney smoke change. That's brilliant writing. This is a weird episode because while Malcolm has a big opening scene the counsel is nowhere to be seen in the entire episode which might be the only time this happened. With the video not much else happens and it makes it seem like a short episode especially since it has no real ending. Nothing happens, just waiting.

Rating: 7.5/10

Dethrelease

    Instead of 20 episodes this season, we got 18 with 2 of them double length, so it balances out. The weird things is it starts with the Ch57 reporter, but for the first time he isn't voiced by Malcolm. We didn't see the smoke, but the album was completed and now chaos ensues to find it. There is a special concert release party, but no indication how anyone got there, just a bunch of people were taken to a secret location. All this madness is going on, yet the band is totally oblivious to it all. They are more amazed by an internet video of a man doing auto fellatio, which is disgusting. This kind of thing has been around for man years, so it's weird they just discovered it. The conversation goes from that to Toki's drinking problem to Murderface deciding he's the fire marshal.
    Malcolm comes in after and his character is purely the yes man to Mr. Salacia. There is no indication he has any powers of his own. On the screen Crozier is made Chief of State, but they say he's chief of all military operations. Then they messed up, he should be Secretary of Defense then.
    Then Charles tries to talk to the band and they are all amazed by stupid voices than Nathan and Pickles can do. It's always amazing that the biggest band in the world is amused by the stupidest little things. Then Nathan wants to hire a yoga instructor to secretly teach them how to auto fellate, but Charles has no idea about it. The UN reveals the Revengencers have grown exponentially, but no reason why is given. They also mention they have a new weapon, but that doesn't seem to go anywhere. It seems they are the one with the nuclear bomb that was hinted at in the beginning and are also aligned with the succubus girls.
    The band forces Murderface to try oral first and it's sick and funny, but they get repulsed pretty fast. Toki comes in late and drunk and no one wants to say anything because it's band policy not to get involved in their personal lives. I read that the band Big Country did the same thing. They didn't get involved in each other's lives and their signer was a bad alcoholic. Turns out he hung himself. Is this where they are going with this storyline? Probably not, I'm sure it won't be mentioned again next season if there is one.
    For the first time we see how much more power Charles has. He leads a team of roadies who do special tasks for him and even has an elite SWAT type unit. He is on the hunt for the assassin who is also hunting him, but they can't find him. The guys can't be found wither and it urns out they lied about stopping their attempts at perversion and hurt their backs trying, except for Toki who was drunk. It's funny how they all look down on him for that, despite what they did.
    Surprisingly the concert goes off without a hitch, there is no mass murder or attacks. It's funny and weird that a band of their imposing stature would have to go through the BS of an industry party. It's not like they need the money or the fame. Like typical teenage types they think it's a party so they have to get wasted. The part with Skwisgaar is funny because he's tuck having to talk to an annoying kid and blows him off until he actually wants to answer a question, then the kid blows him off.
    Then the rest of the episode has all the action and excitement of a movie. Everyone has a role to play as they split off. Nathan gets to close to Toki who asks if he cares. It seems like that was his motivation all along, to see if anyone cared enough to really talk to him. Somehow Skwisgaar & Pickles are able to stop 3 killers. How could these two schmucks be so tough and powerful? Charles gets shot and cut up really bad, it will take a lot to put him back together. I wonder if this means the band will be on their own for a while or will Charles be rebuilt like a Terminator from now on? The crazy thing is after all this time of trying to destroy Dethklok, Crozier shows up and helps save them. Vata and Mr. Salacia don't seem to take any sides, they are just there to brainwash Crozier into doing what they want. It also seems like all their enemies are taken out in one attack - Edgar, the Revengencers, the assassin and the succubus leader. It looks like they need new enemies from here on out.
    Malcolm's Vata appears out in the open for the first time, but doesn't really have much to do. There still is nothing special about the guy. The worst thing is it took them almost an entire year to finish the season. So they probably won't be new episodes until next year. If there is it seems a safe bet Malcolm will return since his character survived. It was a strong ending which is rare these days as season enders seem to suck, like on Heroes. I'll miss the show until it's back, but Robot Chicken is finally back on so maybe Malcolm will appear there again. The sex stuff was sick, but the rest of it was just great and that's why I give it a high rating.

Rating: 9/10

Season 3

Tribute Klok

    News Flash Deathklok Backlash Ch57 - The big news of the day is Dethklok bailed out of performing the Michigan Metal Health Alliance Benefit as William Murderface put it 'they weren't making any money off it.' (Voice of Malcolm). A female reporter says the real backlash happened when Murderface of Dethklok says how he hates everyone and let me spell it out for you, you can suck our trillionarie dicks an drops his pants on a TV panel show. It starts a riot, where one man takes the microphone and says we can't pay our mortgages and Dethklok is laughing at us. F-k them. They've gotten too big, they used to be one of us.
    Charles tells him about the backlash and how it costs millions to cover it up. He shows the group footage of it. Every time Murderface opens his mouth this happens. The roadies go and stop the riot, round up all the people on TV with darts and bodybags and try to get them to cooperate, if they refuse like the guy from the riot, they get lobotomized, relocated and thrown in the dessert. They don't need to know everything that goes into it, just that it's a long expensive process when you William start another media disaster. Will asks why is everyone blaming him. Nathan says you make us consistently look like a bunch of dumb, sheltered assholes. Then the camera pulls back and they are all getting manicures. Skwisgaar says we should put a muzzle on that guy, then notices Toki stole his pants. Toki ignores him and says he'll put a muzzle on him. Skwisgaar wants his pants back. To fix things up with the fans they are lifting the ban on worldwide Dethklok tribute bans tomorrow. 
    Now they are flying off and don't know why. It's a monster ad campaign for a European Pentuplemint Spearmint Gum they are promoting. They think it's brutal and badass. At the party they eat this snooty food wearing designer suits. The commercial has them on these lame jetskis singing this wimpy theme song. Then the ski in the shape of a pentagram. At the end it says they totally endorse it. William says it's seriously chewy. Nathan says oh that was not very good. A kid comes up to Nathan, he tells him to go away and the kid says he thinks he's a total sellout, he's not buying anymore of their stuff, the gum is lame and throws a drink in his face. They tell him it's a European ad it doesn't make a difference. Apparently it does.
    Nathan is talking about what are they doing selling gum in Europe, it's not brutal, we wouldn't have done that when we started. We are totally out of touch, right everyone? The camera pulls back to show he's in a bed full of naked supermodels.
    They lift the ban on the Dethklok tribute bands. They have to approve or disapprove them. First up is Smoothklok they play jazzy songs. It's crap, brutal if you had to listen to it. Then Ladyklok and all female band. They say no way. Women aren't brutal. They say it's creepy the lady Pickles is hot. From Korea DethKrok. No. The Barberklok Quartet. No. Cocklok. No. Thunderhorse. No. Toki says yes he likes them. Pickles says wait. They go for a close up and say Toki is in the band and he's playing Skwisgaar in a wig.
    At dinner they all can't believe it. They say that's like jerking off to yourself. Toki's not paying tribute to himself, he's playing Skwisgaar. Skwisgaar says that's why my clothes are missing, that's weird. We are really good and play every Thursday. They are mad that is when he had Astronaut class, William told everyone and now he's a liar. He wants them to go see. Nathan says wait, crappy band, small club, maybe they should go.
    The club is so tiny. Pickles says it's an optical illusion look, then he crashes into the stage and says it is tiny. The owner is Jimmy  Palamino of the Tribute Emporium the next to the best thing. Everyone's name has been changed except Skwisgaar and he's mad. They play and watch. After Nathan says you've got to let us into the band. Skwisgaar can play Toki a better Toki. No one would know it was them. They want to take a break from the spoiled rich guy life and what would be better to be in a tribute band to the best band of the world Dethklok.
    Out back Nathan tells Thunderhorse they are all fired, can't stay here. We are thinking what's best for Thunderhorse. You have 5 seconds before the beatings begin, except for you the fat Murderface. Kidding, get out. He runs.
The counsel meets. The senator says we are faced with a volatile situation. Dethklok has deliberately stepped down from celebrity status in order to step down into normal society. Vata says, 'If this type of behavior spread to the greater celebrity world the effects could be devastating. We have a celebrity specialist to tell us more.'
    He is a fat man who says, 'Once a mortal becomes a celebrity their credibility is constantly challenged by regular jackoffs. They search for their innocence and then realize they have to flee from the public if Deatklok does the consequences could be abominable. The economy will be begin to fall upon itself and crumble. We will all die.' Senator, 'Good god, it's our worst nightmare.' Vata, 'Exactly.' Senator, 'What can we do?' Vata, 'Right now nothing, we can only pray by that by some miracle Dethklok comes to their senses.'
    They play to a big crowd and after Nathan says can you believe this. It's brutal. No top shelf booze, no wide screen TVs. The owner says they almost sounded like the real thing. Here's a few beer tickets. They have no idea what it is. They go to the bar and no on wants to do it. Pickles volunteers and hands a ticket to the bartender. 'Guys it's a beer.' They are amazed. They never got tickets before. All they ever get is all the booze they can drink, they never get beer tickets. Then some fat girl approaches Nathan to play the Metal Health Alliance Benefit they turned own in the beginning. They say no at first, then say Dethklok never would, but Thunderhorse would, they'll do it. A kid invites them to a party. Will there be ugly chicks so they can go back to their roots? Probably. Let's go.
    They think it's awesome they are getting in touch with their roots in their little RV. Then all their stomachs start to growl. They usually eat when the servants ring the bell. They haven't eaten days. They are starving and only have beer tickets. How are we gonna eat? Nathan says we are hungry, I'll get a gig.
    They go to the ice rink to play music for people to skate to. The owner says the only payment is all the spaghetti they can eat. That's all they want, would spend their money on it anyway. They see no load in team, can you page them, getting low on time. No, you'll have to load your own gear. They do it all wrong and tell Murderface he hasn't loaded his. He says he's not going to. Everyone loads their own stuff it's the rules. He says he'll pretend play, it won't be the first time. Nathan says that's good to know. Little girls and their moms skate. Murderface starts drooling and wanders across to the food pot with his cord behind him. A girl cuts the cord with her rollerskates and falls sending her skate through the air and it hits a guy in the forehead and he knocks over the spaghetti all over the floor an the live wire gets wet and kills all the people on the ice. Nathan says great the spaghetti is ruined. He says at least they have the gig at Palamino's, make sure to get paid in actual money.
    After the gig there is only 1 person in the crowd. The smallest audience they've ever played to. The guy says you must've forgotten to flyer. They don't know what that means. They feel like they are from outer space. Nathan says put the info on paper, give it to the right people, bam, we'll be turning them away.
On a newsmag TV show the Pentlemint gum company was attacked for exploiting the band. It cost them $12 million in repairs. Who is to blame because where is Dethklok? Nathan sees it and says it's a good time not to be in Dethklok. In related news Thunderhorse the tribute band has signed on for the Health Alliance. Big deal, sloppy seconds anyone?
    Nathan says they have little money so they can't get many fliers, have to place them really strategically. In the Kinko's place the dorky cashier mocks them for being a band he's never heard of trying to make it. He acts like he is cool an they are nothing. Nathan says if he wasn't so lethargic he would beat his head in and make the copies himself. He doesn't know why he's so tired. He knows he didn't eat. Pickles says they need a good night's sleep too. In their small van they are shown looking burned out as Skwisgaar has sex with a girl behind them with a curtain. They have 100 flyers, need to give them to people who will go to a show. Do not f-k this up Murderface. Murderface takes his and puts them all in the trash. The others put them on homeless people and stick them on people who don't want them. The old Thunderhorse is now Serpents N' Containers tribute band for Snakes N' Barrels and Nathan covers it up with his flyer. It's $5 to get in.
    Channel 57 says with the benefit and no Dethklok it's being touted as the show of the year more or less since they sound just like them, more or less.
    Nathan is loading the gear and Charles finds them. This is what you are up to? No answer? Doing good with no money or accommodations. Nathan carries a huge amp. Yes. We're fine. You look miserable, angry, hungry. You realize you have Chef's around the world taste test party. Thunderhorse doesn't back down like other bands. He brought turkey beef foie gras. They don't want that, they want their roots. OK, you know where to find me.
    Nathan finds no food backstage at the benefit. Mental Health, here we are. The same kid from the gum party comes in and says I think you are a sellout for doing this concert. Dethklok would never do this concert and you are ruining their name. Nathan says it's hard to say this, but I'm tired of going back to my roots. Pickles is glad he said that. They are in Dethklok because they paid their dues already. Toki isn't. Skwisgaar wants to leaves. They still have to do the benefit. Thunderhorse promised, we didn't. Toki wants the truth. There is an angry mob who do you want to throw out there? Murderface says on stage they aren't playing. He gets hit with a bottle and says he is William Murderface and you can suck his rich dick and drops his pants. Nathan calls for their chopper and the crowd goes for Murderface. The band flies away and lowers a ladder for him as the mob chase him. He gets on the ladder and is pulled up, he gives them the finger, but the ladder breaks and he falls into the crowd.

Interview © KNAC
The Rest © 2007-09 by Alex D. Thrawn for www.MalcolmMcDowell.net